Judges 16:15

KJV

And she said unto him, How canst thou say, I love thee, when thine heart [is] not with me? thou hast mocked me these three times, and hast not told me wherein thy great strength [lieth].

KJV (with Strong's)

And she said {H559} unto him, How {H349} canst thou say {H559}, I love {H157} thee, when thine heart {H3820} is not with me? thou hast mocked {H2048} me these three {H7969} times {H6471}, and hast not told {H5046} me wherein thy great {H1419} strength {H3581} lieth.

Complete Jewish Bible

She said to him, "How can you say you love me when your heart isn't with me? Three times you've made fun of me, and you haven't told me the source of your great strength."

Berean Standard Bible

“How can you say, ‘I love you,’” she asked, “when your heart is not with me? This is the third time you have mocked me and failed to reveal to me the source of your great strength!”

American Standard Version

And she said unto him, How canst thou say, I love thee, when thy heart is not with me? thou hast mocked me these three times, and hast not told me wherein thy great strength lieth.

Commentary

### SUMMARY
Judges 16:15 marks a pivotal moment in the tragic saga of Samson and Delilah, where Delilah escalates her emotional manipulation to extract the secret of Samson's supernatural strength. After three failed attempts to deceive her with false explanations, Samson is confronted with Delilah's accusation that his professed love is insincere, evidenced by his repeated mockery and refusal to disclose the true source of his power. This verse highlights Delilah's cunning persistence and Samson's profound moral weakness, setting the stage for his imminent betrayal and downfall.

### CONTEXT
* **Literary Context:** This verse is situated within the dramatic climax of Samson's narrative in [Judges 16](/judges/16 "Judges 16 - Samson and Delilah"). Following Samson's previous three deceptions (where he claimed his strength lay in new bowstrings, new ropes, and the weaving of his hair into a loom, as seen in [Judges 16:7-13](/judges/16-7 "Judges 16:7-13 - Samson's Deceptions")), Delilah's frustration and the Philistine lords' impatience have reached a peak. Her words in this verse represent a calculated, intensified emotional assault designed to wear down Samson's resistance. The immediate consequence of this verse is Samson's eventual capitulation, revealing his Nazarite vow and the secret of his hair in [Judges 16:17](/judges/16-17 "Judges 16:17 - Samson Reveals His Secret"), leading directly to his capture and blinding. The broader narrative of Samson, beginning in [Judges 13](/judges/13 "Judges 13 - The Birth of Samson"), consistently portrays a man of immense physical power but profound spiritual and moral weakness, often drawn to Philistine women, which ultimately contributes to his tragic end.
* **Historical & Cultural Context:** The book of Judges describes a tumultuous period in Israel's history, characterized by a lack of centralized leadership and repeated cycles of apostasy, oppression by foreign powers (like the Philistines), and divine deliverance through "judges." The Philistines, a technologically advanced and militarily superior people, were a constant threat to Israel's existence. Delilah, a woman from the Philistine valley of Sorek, likely acted as an agent for her people, motivated by the substantial bribe offered by the Philistine lords ([Judges 16:5](/judges/16-5 "Judges 16:5 - Delilah's Bribe")). In this patriarchal society, a woman's influence through emotional manipulation, particularly over a man infatuated with her, was a potent tool. Samson's Nazarite vow, a special consecration to God (detailed in [Numbers 6](/numbers/6 "Numbers 6 - The Law of the Nazirite")), involved specific prohibitions, including cutting his hair. This vow was the visible sign and conduit of his divinely bestowed strength, making its violation a profound act of spiritual rebellion.
* **Key Themes:** Judges 16:15 powerfully encapsulates several key themes prevalent in the book of Judges and the broader biblical narrative. Firstly, it highlights the theme of **Manipulation and Deception**, as Delilah masterfully employs emotional blackmail, feigning hurt and questioning Samson's love to extract vital information. Her "love" is a cynical facade for her true, mercenary intentions. Secondly, the verse starkly contrasts **True Love vs. Infatuation/Lust**. Samson's superficial "love" for Delilah is devoid of genuine trust, honesty, and commitment, revealing his spiritual immaturity and moral compromise. True biblical love, as exemplified by God's character, is rooted in truth and self-sacrifice. Thirdly, it underscores **Samson's Moral and Spiritual Weakness** despite his extraordinary physical prowess. His repeated failure to guard his heart and his sacred Nazarite vow in the face of temptation, particularly from a woman clearly hostile to God's purposes for him, is a tragic flaw. Finally, the verse illustrates the **Consequences of Compromise and Disobedience**. Samson's continued dalliance with Delilah, a direct violation of the spirit of his consecration and a dangerous entanglement with the enemies of God's people, inevitably leads to his capture, humiliation, and suffering, serving as a stark warning about the perils of spiritual compromise, as seen in his eventual loss of strength in [Judges 16:20](/judges/16-20 "Judges 16:20 - Samson's Strength Departs").

### EXPOSITION AND ANALYSIS
#### Key Word Analysis
* **Heart (Hebrew, _levav_):** The Hebrew word for "heart" (לֵבָב, _levav_) in this context refers to the innermost being, encompassing one's will, intellect, emotions, and moral character, not merely romantic affection. When Delilah says "thine heart is not with me," she is accusing Samson of a fundamental lack of sincerity, loyalty, and truthfulness in his entire being, indicating a profound disconnect between his words of love and his true intentions or actions. It implies a withholding of his true self and a lack of genuine commitment.
* **Mocked (Hebrew, _hetalta_):** The verb "mocked" (הֵתַלְתָּ, _hetalta_) is derived from a root meaning "to play the fool with," "to trick," "to deceive," or "to make sport of someone." It conveys a strong sense of deliberate trickery and insult. Delilah's use of this word emphasizes that Samson's previous deceptions were not mere playful evasions but intentional acts of making her look foolish and undermining her efforts, intensifying her frustration and justifying her relentless pursuit of the truth.
* **Strength (Hebrew, _koach_):** The word "strength" (כֹּחַ, _koach_) denotes power, ability, or might. In Samson's case, it refers to his extraordinary, divinely-empowered physical ability that set him apart as a judge and deliverer for Israel. Delilah's persistent demand to know "wherein thy great strength lieth" reveals her singular focus on uncovering the secret source of this supernatural power, which is the key to her fulfilling the Philistine lords' request and securing her reward.

#### Verse Breakdown
* **"And she said unto him, How canst thou say, I love thee, when thine heart [is] not with me?":** This opening clause reveals Delilah's masterful use of emotional manipulation. She directly challenges Samson's verbal profession of love by contrasting it with his actions—or lack thereof, specifically his refusal to share his secret. By questioning his "heart," she targets his deepest affections and loyalties, implying that true love demands transparency and trust. This is a classic tactic of emotional blackmail, designed to induce guilt and compel compliance.
* **"thou hast mocked me these three times":** Delilah's accusation highlights Samson's repeated pattern of deception. The mention of "three times" emphasizes the deliberate and consistent nature of his lies, building a case against his sincerity. This repetition not only underscores her frustration but also serves as a rhetorical device to intensify the pressure on Samson, making it harder for him to evade her question again without appearing utterly untrustworthy.
* **"and hast not told me wherein thy great strength [lieth].":** This final clause cuts to the chase, revealing the true motive behind Delilah's emotional plea. Her feigned hurt and accusations of insincere love are merely a means to an end: to uncover the secret of Samson's strength. This direct demand exposes her underlying agenda and the transactional nature of her relationship with Samson, demonstrating that her interest is not in him but in his power.

#### Literary Devices
Judges 16:15 is rich with **Irony**, primarily in the stark contrast between Samson's immense physical strength and his profound moral and spiritual weakness. He, the mighty deliverer, is easily overcome by the emotional manipulation of a foreign woman. There is also **Dramatic Irony**, as the reader knows Delilah's true, malicious intentions (bribed by the Philistines), while Samson, blinded by infatuation, repeatedly falls into her traps. The verse employs **Repetition**, specifically "these three times," which emphasizes the persistent nature of Samson's deceptions and Delilah's relentless pursuit, building narrative tension and foreshadowing the inevitable revelation. Delilah's speech itself is a prime example of **Emotional Blackmail** and **Manipulation**, where she uses the language of love and betrayal to coerce information, twisting Samson's words against him. Her plea is also a form of **Rhetorical Question**, designed not to elicit an answer about how he *can* say he loves her, but to accuse and pressure him into revealing the desired information.

### THEOLOGICAL AND THEMATIC CONNECTIONS
This verse serves as a powerful theological commentary on the nature of truth, love, and the perils of compromise. Delilah's manipulative questioning exposes the superficiality of Samson's "love," which lacks the foundational elements of honesty and trust. Biblically, true love is characterized by truth and self-giving, not deceit or self-preservation at another's expense. Samson's repeated deception and eventual surrender underscore the critical importance of guarding one's heart and convictions, especially when faced with persistent temptation or emotional manipulation that seeks to undermine one's spiritual principles. His tragic downfall, rooted in his spiritual weakness and dalliance with a woman hostile to God's purposes, serves as a stark warning that even seemingly small acts of compromise can erode spiritual strength and lead to devastating consequences, stripping away one's purpose and freedom. The narrative demonstrates that God's power, though mighty, is not a license for human carelessness or disobedience; rather, it is often contingent on faithfulness to His covenant.

* [Proverbs 4:23](/proverbs/4-23 "Proverbs 4:23 - Guard Your Heart")
* [1 John 4:7-8](/1_john/4-7 "1 John 4:7-8 - God is Love")
* [James 1:22](/james/1-22 "James 1:22 - Be Doers of the Word")

### REFLECTION AND APPLICATION
Judges 16:15 offers profound lessons for contemporary believers, urging us to cultivate discernment in our relationships and to vigilantly guard our spiritual integrity. Samson's story reminds us that professed affection can sometimes mask ulterior motives or a lack of genuine commitment, highlighting the need to evaluate relationships based on consistent actions and truthfulness, not just words. We are called to be wise as serpents and innocent as doves, recognizing manipulative tactics and refusing to compromise our convictions for the sake of fleeting desires or emotional pressure. Just as Samson's strength was tied to his vow, our spiritual strength is linked to our faithfulness to God's Word and our covenant relationship with Him. Any compromise, however seemingly small, can gradually erode our spiritual vitality and leave us vulnerable to the enemy's schemes, ultimately leading to loss of purpose and freedom.

#### Questions for Reflection
* **How do we discern genuine affection from manipulative intent in our relationships, both personal and spiritual?**
* **In what areas of our lives might we be compromising our convictions or spiritual disciplines, similar to Samson's dalliance with Delilah?**
* **What does it truly mean to "guard your heart" in a world full of temptations, deceptions, and emotional pressures?**
* **How does the pursuit of personal desires, unchecked by spiritual discipline and accountability, lead to spiritual weakness and vulnerability?**

### FAQ
**Why was Delilah so persistent in her questioning of Samson?**

Answer: Delilah's relentless persistence was primarily driven by a substantial financial incentive. The Philistine lords had offered her an enormous sum of money—"eleven hundred pieces of silver from each one of us" ([Judges 16:5](/judges/16-5 "Judges 16:5 - Delilah's Bribe"))—to uncover the secret of Samson's strength. Her persistence was not born of genuine affection but of greed and loyalty to her people, making her a mercenary agent in a political and military conflict.

**What does "thine heart is not with me" mean in this context?**

Answer: When Delilah says, "thine heart is not with me," she is accusing Samson of a fundamental lack of sincerity and truthfulness in his innermost being. The "heart" in biblical terms refers to the core of one's intellect, will, emotions, and moral character. She implies that his words of love are hollow because his actions (his repeated deception and refusal to share his secret) reveal a deeper disloyalty and a withholding of his true self. It signifies a profound disconnect between his outward profession and his inward reality.

**Was Samson truly in love with Delilah?**

Answer: The text suggests that Samson was deeply infatuated with or lusted after Delilah, but his actions contradict the biblical understanding of genuine love. True love, as described in Scripture, is characterized by honesty, trust, self-sacrifice, and a commitment to the well-being of the other person ([1 Corinthians 13:4-7](/1_corinthians/13-4 "1 Corinthians 13:4-7 - The Nature of Love")). Samson's repeated deception of Delilah, even while claiming to love her, demonstrates a superficial and self-serving affection that ultimately led to his downfall. His "love" was a weakness exploited by his enemy, rather than a spiritual strength.

### CHRIST-CENTERED FULFILLMENT
Samson's tragic story, particularly his moral weakness and susceptibility to temptation in Judges 16:15, powerfully foreshadows the perfect strength and unwavering integrity of Jesus Christ. Samson, the physically mighty but spiritually compromised judge, failed to guard his heart and his sacred vow, ultimately succumbing to the manipulative "love" of Delilah. This stands in stark contrast to Christ, who, though tempted in every way, remained without sin ([Hebrews 4:15](/hebrews/4-15 "Hebrews 4:15 - Christ's Sinlessness")). While Samson's strength was tied to a physical vow and ultimately departed from him due to his disobedience ([Judges 16:20](/judges/16-20 "Judges 16:20 - Samson's Strength Departs")), Christ's strength is inherent, eternal, and rooted in His perfect obedience to the Father's will, even unto death on the cross ([Philippians 2:8](/philippians/2-8 "Philippians 2:8 - Christ's Obedience")). Samson was betrayed by a woman he claimed to love, leading to his humiliation; Christ was betrayed by a disciple, Judas, but this betrayal led not to His defeat, but to the ultimate triumph over sin and death, fulfilling God's redemptive plan ([Matthew 26:47-50](/matthew/26-47 "Matthew 26:47-50 - The Betrayal of Jesus")). Where Samson failed as a deliverer due to his own moral failings, Jesus is the true and ultimate Deliverer, the [Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world](/john/1-29 "John 1:29 - Jesus, the Lamb of God"), whose love is not manipulative but self-sacrificial ([John 15:13](/john/15-13 "John 15:13 - Greater Love Has No One Than This")). His "heart" was always perfectly aligned with the Father's will, and He never mocked or deceived, but always spoke truth and demonstrated perfect love, offering genuine freedom and eternal life to all who believe.

Note: Commentary is generated by AI with a directive for Biblical fidelity. Always rely on the Holy Spirit for discernment. The Scripture text and cross-references are from verified, non-AI sources.

Cross-References

Judges 14:16

And Samson's wife wept before him, and said, Thou dost but hate me, and lovest me not: thou hast put forth a riddle unto the children of my people, and hast not told [it] me. And he said unto her, Behold, I have not told [it] my father nor my mother, and shall I tell [it] thee?

1 John 2:15

Love not the world, neither the things [that are] in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

1 John 2:16

For all that [is] in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

Genesis 29:20

And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him [but] a few days, for the love he had to her.

Proverbs 5:3

For the lips of a strange woman drop [as] an honeycomb, and her mouth [is] smoother than oil:

Proverbs 5:14

I was almost in all evil in the midst of the congregation and assembly.

John 14:15

¶ If ye love me, keep my commandments.