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“The Marriage Negotiation Begins”· Genesis 34:5–12
Translation
King James Version
And Shechem said unto her father and unto her brethren, Let me find grace in your eyes, and what ye shall say unto me I will give.
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KJV (with Strong's)
And Shechem H7927 said H559 unto her father H1 and unto her brethren H251, Let me find H4672 grace H2580 in your eyes H5869, and what ye shall say H559 unto me I will give H5414.
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Complete Jewish Bible
Then Sh'khem said to her father and brothers, "Only accept me, and I will give whatever you tell me.
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Berean Standard Bible
Then Shechem said to Dinah’s father and brothers, “Grant me this favor, and I will give you whatever you ask.
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American Standard Version
And Shechem said unto her father and unto her brethren, Let me find favor in your eyes, and what ye shall say unto me I will give.
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World English Bible Messianic
Shechem said to her father and to her brothers, “Let me find favor in your eyes, and whatever you will tell me I will give.
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Geneva Bible (1599)
Shechem also said vnto her father and vnto her brethren, Let me finde fauour in your eyes, and I will giue whatsoeuer ye shall appoint me.
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Young's Literal Translation
And Shechem saith unto her father, and unto her brethren, `Let me find grace in your eyes, and that which ye say unto me, I give;
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Study This Verse

Summary

Genesis 34:11 records Shechem's urgent and desperate plea to Jacob and his sons after his defilement of Dinah. He seeks their favor and offers to pay any price to legitimize his desire to marry her, attempting to resolve a profound moral and familial offense through material compensation. This act underscores a worldly approach to sin and sets the immediate stage for the cunning deception and violent retribution subsequently exacted by Dinah's brothers.

Context

Literary Context

This verse is situated at a pivotal moment in the narrative of Jacob's family, immediately following the traumatic defilement of Dinah, Jacob's only daughter mentioned in this generation, by Shechem, the son of Hamor the Hivite Genesis 34:1-2. The preceding verses establish Shechem's intense desire for Dinah, leading his father, Hamor, to initiate formal negotiations with Jacob's family. However, in this verse, Shechem bypasses the formal channels of his father and directly addresses Jacob and Dinah's brothers, acknowledging the gravity of his actions by seeking their "grace" or favor. His offer to pay any requested sum is a desperate attempt to buy acceptance and secure his wish for Dinah, yet it profoundly underestimates the depth of the dishonor brought upon Jacob's household, particularly in the eyes of Dinah's full brothers, Simeon and Levi. This direct appeal sets the stage for the deceptive counter-proposal from Jacob's sons and the brutal vengeance that follows Genesis 34:13-31.

Historical & Cultural Context

In the ancient Near East, the defilement of a virgin was a grave offense that brought immense shame upon her family. Such an act typically required significant compensation (a bride-price, or mohar, often doubled or more) and, frequently, the perpetrator was compelled to marry the victim to restore some measure of honor and provide for her future, as seen in later Israelite law (e.g., Exodus 22:16-17 and Deuteronomy 22:28-29). Shechem's offer to "give" whatever they ask aligns with these cultural expectations, indicating his understanding of the need for material redress. His plea to "find grace in your eyes" is a conventional diplomatic idiom for seeking favor or acceptance. The Hivites, as inhabitants of the land, would have had their own customs, but the patriarchal family of Jacob, as sojourners with a distinct covenant identity, would view such an act through the lens of their familial and nascent covenant honor, which could not be simply bought or sold.

Key Themes

This verse contributes significantly to several overarching themes in Genesis and the broader biblical narrative. It highlights the gravity of sexual sin and its far-reaching consequences, demonstrating how a singular act of defilement can unravel peace and lead to further violence, as seen throughout Genesis 34. The theme of familial honor and covenant identity is paramount; Dinah's defilement is an assault not just on her person, but on the very honor of Jacob's household, which is tied to their distinct identity as God's chosen family. Shechem's attempt to resolve the crisis through material compensation underscores the insufficiency of human efforts or worldly wealth to atone for deep moral and spiritual offenses, a theme that recurs throughout Scripture. Furthermore, the narrative contrasts Shechem's transactional approach with the brothers' vengeful "justice," revealing the complexities of human attempts at justice versus divine standards and foreshadowing the ongoing struggle between human sin and God's ultimate redemptive plan.

Exposition and Analysis

Key Word Analysis

grace chên' H2580

From the root חָנַן (chanan), meaning to be gracious or show favor, this word denotes graciousness, kindness, or favor, whether subjective (as in the disposition of the giver) or objective (as in beauty or pleasantness). Here, Shechem's use of chên signifies a plea for human kindness, acceptance, or leniency from Jacob and his sons, not a request for divine favor or spiritual forgiveness. It indicates his desire for their approval to proceed with his intentions, despite his egregious act.

find mâtsâʼ' H4672

A primitive root meaning "to come forth to," "appear or exist," and transitively, "to attain," "find," or "acquire." In this context, Shechem's desire to "find grace" means to obtain or achieve favor and acceptance in their sight. It implies a search or an effort to secure a desired outcome, highlighting his active pursuit of their approval.

give nâthan' H5414

A primitive root with a very broad range of application, meaning "to give," "put," "make," "appoint," "bestow," or "yield." Here, Shechem's declaration "I will give" is a strong and sincere promise to provide whatever material compensation, dowry, or gifts are requested. It underscores his willingness to use his wealth and resources to rectify the situation, from his perspective, and secure the marriage.

Verse Breakdown

"And Shechem said unto her father and unto her brethren,"

This clause highlights Shechem's direct and personal intervention. While his father, Hamor, was engaged in formal negotiations with Jacob, Shechem's immediate address to both Jacob and Dinah's brothers signifies his urgent and personal desire to secure Dinah. By addressing the brothers, he acknowledges their significant role in the family's honor and their authority over their sister's future, recognizing the collective nature of the offense.

"Let me find grace in your eyes,"

This is Shechem's direct plea for favor and acceptance. The phrase "in your eyes" (בְעֵינֵיכֶם, bəʿênêḵem) is an idiom meaning "in your sight" or "in your estimation." Shechem is not seeking genuine repentance or moral forgiveness, but rather their permission and willingness to overlook his actions for the sake of his desired marriage to Dinah. He seeks their social and familial approval, recognizing that he has committed a serious transgression requiring their leniency.

"and what ye shall say unto me I will give."

This final clause reveals Shechem's strategy: to offer unlimited material compensation. He is willing to pay any price—a substantial bride-price (mohar), gifts, or other forms of restitution—to secure Dinah as his wife and appease her family. This demonstrates a transactional approach to a profound moral and spiritual offense, suggesting Shechem believes that wealth can rectify the deep dishonor and violation he inflicted, failing to grasp the true depth of the family's wounded honor and the spiritual implications of his sin.

Literary Devices

The verse employs several significant literary devices. Plea or Supplication is evident in Shechem's direct address and his request to "find grace," indicating a humble, albeit self-serving, appeal for favor. There is a strong element of Irony in Shechem's attempt to resolve a violent act of defilement with a transactional offer of material wealth, highlighting the inadequacy of worldly solutions for spiritual and moral breaches. This transactional approach also sets up a Contrast with the deeply held values of honor and covenant identity within Jacob's family, which cannot be bought. Furthermore, Shechem's desperate offer Foreshadows the subsequent deceptive counter-offer by Dinah's brothers, which, while appearing to accept his terms, is actually a prelude to their brutal vengeance, revealing the tragic trajectory of sin begetting further sin.

Theological and Thematic Connections

Shechem's offer to pay "what ye shall say" in Genesis 34:11 powerfully illustrates humanity's inherent tendency to believe that deep moral and spiritual wrongs can be rectified through financial or material means. This highlights the profound inadequacy of such efforts to atone for sin, especially when true repentance and genuine reconciliation are absent. The narrative underscores that offenses against purity and honor, particularly within a covenant community, cannot be simply bought off; they demand a deeper, more transformative response. This thematic thread resonates throughout Scripture, emphasizing that true atonement and forgiveness come not from human works or material offerings, but from divine grace and a perfect sacrifice.

Reflection and Application

Genesis 34:11 serves as a stark and enduring reminder that attempts to rectify profound wrongs with mere material compensation or superficial pleas for favor often fall profoundly short. Shechem's transactional approach to a grievous sin reveals a common human inclination to minimize the true cost of offense, believing that a monetary payment can erase the stain of dishonor and violation. However, true reconciliation and restoration require genuine repentance, a full acknowledgment of the harm caused, and a willingness to address the root of the offense, not just its immediate consequences. This narrative challenges us to consider how we approach conflict and sin in our own lives and communities. Do we seek superficial solutions or genuine, transformative reconciliation that addresses the heart of the matter? It highlights the lasting and devastating impact of sin, not only on the immediate victims but also on the perpetrator and their community, urging us to pursue justice and healing that align with God's righteous standards, rather than human expediency or vengeance.

Questions for Reflection

  1. How does Shechem's offer to "give" whatever is asked illustrate a common human misunderstanding of sin and its remedy?
  2. In what ways do we, in our modern context, sometimes attempt to "buy" our way out of consequences or offer superficial gestures instead of genuine repentance and reconciliation?
  3. What does this narrative teach us about the profound impact of dishonor and the importance of integrity within families and communities?

FAQ

Why did Shechem offer to pay "what ye shall say"?

Shechem's offer reflects the ancient Near Eastern customs regarding bride-price (mohar) and compensation for damages. In this culture, the defilement of a virgin required significant compensation to her family, and often, the perpetrator was obligated to marry her (e.g., Exodus 22:16-17). Shechem was attempting to legitimize the union and compensate for the dishonor he inflicted, treating the situation as a financial transaction to secure his desired outcome and appease the offended family.

Does "Let me find grace in your eyes" imply genuine remorse?

While the phrase indicates Shechem's desire for acceptance and his recognition that he had offended the family, the context suggests it was primarily a plea for leniency and a means to achieve his goal of marrying Dinah. It appears to be more about securing a favorable outcome for himself and avoiding severe retribution than a deep, contrite repentance for the moral wrong of defilement itself. His focus was on the practical resolution of the crisis, not necessarily a transformation of heart regarding his sin.

Christ-Centered Fulfillment

The narrative of Shechem's attempt to "buy" grace and rectify his sin through material compensation in Genesis 34:11 powerfully foreshadows humanity's inherent inability to atone for sin through any human effort or offering. Just as Shechem's offer, however generous, could not truly cleanse Dinah's defilement or restore the honor of Jacob's family, no amount of human "giving," self-righteous works, or seeking of favor can reconcile humanity with a holy God. This narrative points to the profound need for a different kind of "grace" and "payment"—one that only Christ can provide. The Apostle Paul declares in Romans 3:23-24 that "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus." Through His perfect life, atoning death on the cross, and victorious resurrection, Jesus Christ paid the ultimate price for sin, offering true grace and reconciliation that transcends any material offering or human effort. He alone restores honor to God and provides genuine cleansing and forgiveness, fulfilling what human attempts, like Shechem's, could never achieve, as Ephesians 2:8-9 beautifully states, "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast."

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Public-domain commentary

Matthew Henry

From his Commentary on the Whole Bible. Henry comments on passages, not single verses — this entry covers Genesis 34:6–17. His two-level outline is real structure in the source text, so it is rendered as structure.

1662–1714 · 12 verses
Passage under commentGenesis 34:6–17
I. II. Main points1. 2. Sub-points

Jacob's sons, when they heard of the injury done to Dinah, showed a very great resentment of it, influenced perhaps rather by jealousy for the honour of their family than by a sense of virtue. Many are concerned at the shamefulness of sin that never lay to heart the sinfulness of it. It is here called folly in Israel (Gen 34:7), according to the language of after-times; for Israel was not yet a people, but a family only. Note, 1. Uncleanness is folly; for it sacrifices the favour of God, peace of conscience, and all the soul can pretend to that is sacred and honourable, to a base and brutish lust. 2. This folly is most shameful in Israel, in a family of Israel, where God is known and worshipped, as he was in Jacob's tents, by the name of the God of Israel. Folly in Israel is scandalous indeed. 3. It is a good thing to have sin stamped with a bad name: uncleanness is here proverbially called folly in Israel, Sa2 13:12. Dinah is here called Jacob's daughter, for warning to all the daughters of Israel, that they betray not themselves to this folly.

Hamor came to treat with Jacob himself, but he turns him over to his sons; and here we have a particular account of the treaty, in which, it is a shame to say, the Canaanites were more honest than the Israelites.

I.Hamor and Shechem fairly propose this match, in order to a coalition in trade.

Shechem is deeply in love with Dinah; he will have her upon any terms, Gen 34:11, Gen 34:12. His father not only consents, but solicits for him, and gravely insists upon the advantages that would follow from the union of the families, Gen 34:9, Gen 34:10. He shows no jealousy of Jacob, though he was a stranger, but rather an earnest desire to settle a correspondence with him and his family, making him that generous offer, The land shall be before you, trade you therein.

II.Jacob's sons basely pretend to insist upon a coalition in religion, when really they designed nothing less.

If Jacob had taken the management of this affair into his own hands, it is probable that he and Hamor would soon have concluded it; but Jacob's sons meditate only revenge, and a strange project they have for the compassing of it - the Shechemites must be circumcised; not to make them holy (they never intended that), but to make them sore, that they might become an easier prey to their sword.

1.The pretence was specious. "It is the honour of Jacob's family that they carry about with them the token of God's covenant with them; and it will be a reproach to those that are thus dignified and distinguished to enter into such a strict alliance with those that are uncircumcised (Gen 34:14); and therefore, if you will be circumcised, then we will become one people with you," Gen 34:15, Gen 34:16. Had they been sincere herein their proposal of these terms would have had in it something commendable; for Israelites should not intermarry with Canaanites, professors with profane; it is a great sin, or at least the cause and inlet of a great deal, and has often been of pernicious consequence. The interest we have in any persons, and the hold we have of them, should be wisely improved by us, to bring them to the love and practice of religion (He that winneth souls is wise); but then we must not, like Jacob's sons, think it enough to persuade them to submit to the external rites of religion, but must endeavour to convince them of its reasonableness, and to bring them acquainted with the power of it.

2.The intention was malicious, as appears by the sequel of the story; all they aimed at was to prepare them for the day of slaughter. Note, Bloody designs have often been covered, and carried on, with a pretence of religion; thus they have been accomplished most plausibly and most securely: but this dissembled piety is, doubtless, double iniquity. Religion is never more injured, nor are God's sacraments more profaned, than when they are thus used for a cloak of maliciousness. Nay, if Jacob's sons had not had this bloody design, I do not see how they could justify their offering the sacred sign of circumcision, the seal of God's covenant, to these devoted Canaanites, who had no part nor lot in the matter. Those had no right to the seal that had no right to the promise. It is not meet to take the children's bread, and cast it to dogs: but Jacob's sons valued not this, while they could make it serve their turn.

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Source: Quotations drawn from early Church Fathers and historical Christian theologians (AD 100–1500). Some quotes address the surrounding passage context rather than this verse alone.
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