2 Samuel 13:12

KJV

And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly.

KJV (with Strong's)

And she answered {H559} him, Nay, my brother {H251}, do not force {H6031} me; for no such thing ought {H3651} to be done {H6213} in Israel {H3478}: do {H6213} not thou this folly {H5039}.

Complete Jewish Bible

"No, my brother," she answered him, "don't force me! Things like this aren't done in Isra'el; don't behave so disgracefully!

Berean Standard Bible

“No, my brother!” she cried. “Do not humiliate me, for such a thing should never be done in Israel. Do not do this disgraceful thing!

American Standard Version

And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly.

Commentary

### SUMMARY
2 Samuel 13:12 records Tamar's desperate and poignant plea to her half-brother Amnon, imploring him to abandon his wicked intent to rape her. Her words highlight the egregious nature of the act, appealing to their familial bond, the moral standards of Israel, and the profound disgrace such an act would bring. This verse marks a tragic turning point in the narrative, underscoring the breakdown of moral order within David's household and setting in motion a chain of devastating consequences.

### CONTEXT
* **Literary Context:** This verse is situated at the climax of a deeply disturbing narrative in [2 Samuel 13](/2_samuel/13 "2 Samuel 13 - Amnon and Tamar"). Amnon, King David's eldest son, has become infatuated with his half-sister Tamar, Absalom's full sister. Guided by his cunning cousin Jonadab, Amnon feigns illness to lure Tamar to his private chambers, ostensibly to prepare him food. Tamar, unaware of his true intentions, innocently complies. Her plea in verse 12 comes immediately before Amnon's violent act, serving as a final, futile attempt to avert the impending horror. The narrative then details the rape, Amnon's subsequent repulsion and expulsion of Tamar, and Absalom's silent, simmering rage, which ultimately leads to Amnon's murder and Absalom's rebellion against David. This event is a direct fulfillment of the prophecy given by Nathan to David in [2 Samuel 12:10-11](/2_samuel/12-10 "2 Samuel 12:10-11 - Nathan's Prophecy of Trouble in David's House"), that "the sword shall never depart from your house" and that calamity would arise from within his own family.
* **Historical & Cultural Context:** Ancient Israelite society, like many in the Near East, placed immense value on family honor, female chastity, and the sanctity of kinship. Incestuous relationships, particularly between siblings or half-siblings, were strictly forbidden and considered an abomination under Mosaic Law, as detailed in [Leviticus 18:9](/leviticus/18-9 "Leviticus 18:9 - Laws Against Incest") and [Deuteronomy 27:22](/deuteronomy/27-22 "Deuteronomy 27:22 - Curse for Lying with a Sister"). Such acts brought profound shame not only upon the individuals involved but also upon their entire family and the community. A virgin daughter's purity was paramount to her marriageability and the family's reputation. Rape was a capital offense in certain circumstances and always a grave violation. Tamar's status as a princess, a daughter of the king, further amplified the severity of the transgression, as it was an act of violence and dishonor within the royal family, threatening the stability and moral authority of the kingdom itself.
* **Key Themes:** This verse powerfully contributes to several overarching themes within 2 Samuel and the broader Deuteronomistic History. It highlights the **corrupting influence of unchecked desire and power**, demonstrating how Amnon's lust, coupled with his royal privilege, led to a heinous act. It underscores the **sanctity of kinship and the abhorrence of sexual immorality** within Israel, as Tamar explicitly states, "no such thing ought to be done in Israel." The theme of **divine judgment and the consequences of sin** is also prominent, as this event is a direct outworking of Nathan's prophecy against David's house, stemming from David's own sin with Bathsheba and Uriah ([2 Samuel 11](/2_samuel/11 "2 Samuel 11 - David's Sin with Bathsheba")). Furthermore, it introduces the theme of **injustice and the vulnerability of the innocent**, as Tamar, despite her desperate pleas, is subjected to brutal violence with devastating long-term psychological and social consequences. Her subsequent desolation in [2 Samuel 13:19-20](/2_samuel/13-19 "2 Samuel 13:19-20 - Tamar's Desolation") vividly portrays the profound impact of such trauma.

### EXPOSITION AND ANALYSIS
#### Key Word Analysis
* **Nay (Hebrew, _ʾal_):** This particle serves as a strong negative imperative, conveying a desperate plea to stop an action. It is a direct, emphatic refusal and prohibition, highlighting Tamar's clear and unambiguous rejection of Amnon's advances. It signifies her moral conviction and her absolute lack of consent, making Amnon's subsequent act all the more heinous.
* **Force (Hebrew, _ʿinnâ_):** This verb means "to afflict, humble, violate, rape." In this context, it specifically refers to sexual violence, the act of violating a woman's body against her will. It implies a brutal subjugation and degradation. The use of this term emphasizes the violent and non-consensual nature of Amnon's intent, stripping Tamar of her dignity and autonomy.
* **Folly (Hebrew, _nəḇālâ_):** This is a crucial term. It signifies more than mere foolishness; it denotes a morally reprehensible, outrageous, and disgraceful act that goes against divine and human law. It implies a deep moral depravity, a shameful wickedness that brings public disgrace. This same term is used in [Genesis 34:7](/genesis/34-7 "Genesis 34:7 - Dinah's Defilement") to describe the rape of Dinah, underscoring the severity and public dishonor associated with such actions. It is a term reserved for acts that are an abomination in Israel, acts that violate the very fabric of covenantal community and moral order.

#### Verse Breakdown
* **"And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me;":** Tamar's immediate response is a direct and desperate refusal. Her address, "my brother," is a poignant appeal to their familial bond and the sacred trust inherent in that relationship. It is an attempt to remind Amnon of his moral obligation and the profound violation of kinship he is contemplating. The phrase "do not force me" is a clear and unequivocal declaration of non-consent, highlighting the violent and coercive nature of Amnon's intent.
* **"for no such thing ought to be done in Israel:":** This clause elevates Tamar's plea from a personal one to a communal and theological one. She appeals to the established moral and legal standards of the nation of Israel, implying that Amnon's intended act is not merely a private sin but a public disgrace and an affront to the covenant community. It is an act that violates the very principles upon which Israel was founded, specifically the laws against incest and sexual violence.
* **"do not thou this folly.":** Tamar concludes her plea by explicitly labeling Amnon's intended act as "folly" (_nəḇālâ_). This is a powerful indictment, signifying that his action is not merely a mistake but a deliberate act of moral depravity and wickedness that will bring shame and disgrace upon himself, his family, and the nation. It is a final, desperate warning of the profound moral and social consequences of his sin.

#### Literary Devices
The verse employs several powerful literary devices. **Pathos** is evident in Tamar's desperate and pleading tone, designed to evoke pity and moral conviction in Amnon. Her repeated appeals ("my brother," "do not force me," "no such thing ought to be done," "do not thou this folly") create a sense of urgency and vulnerability. The use of the term "**folly**" (_nəḇālâ_) functions as a form of **hyperbole** and **euphemism**, simultaneously understating the act's brutality while condemning it as utterly abominable and morally bankrupt. There is also a tragic **irony** in Tamar's appeal to "what ought to be done in Israel," as the subsequent narrative reveals the profound moral failure of the royal family, including David's own inaction, to uphold these very standards. Her words also serve as a form of **foreshadowing**, hinting at the catastrophic consequences that will indeed follow this "folly" for David's house.

### THEOLOGICAL AND THEMATIC CONNECTIONS
Tamar's desperate cry in 2 Samuel 13:12 resonates with profound theological implications, underscoring the gravity of sin, particularly sexual violence and the abuse of power, within God's covenant people. It highlights that God's moral law is not arbitrary but reflects His holy character and is designed for the flourishing of humanity and community. When these laws are violated, especially by those in positions of authority, the consequences are devastating, leading to brokenness, injustice, and societal decay. The narrative serves as a stark reminder that even within the chosen lineage, sin's destructive power can wreak havoc, demonstrating the need for divine intervention and ultimate redemption. It foreshadows the ultimate need for a King who would perfectly uphold righteousness and justice, unlike David's flawed family.

* [Leviticus 18:9](/leviticus/18-9 "Leviticus 18:9 - Laws Against Incest")
* [Deuteronomy 27:22](/deuteronomy/27-22 "Deuteronomy 27:22 - Curse for Lying with a Sister")
* [James 1:15](/james/1-15 "James 1:15 - Lust Leading to Sin and Death")

### REFLECTION AND APPLICATION
Tamar's plea in 2 Samuel 13:12 remains a powerful and haunting reminder of the devastating impact of sin, especially sexual violence and the abuse of power. It compels us to consider the sanctity of human dignity, the importance of consent, and the profound responsibility that comes with any position of authority or influence. For believers, this narrative underscores the call to uphold God's moral standards in all relationships, recognizing that our actions have far-reaching consequences, not just for ourselves but for our families and communities. It challenges us to confront the reality of evil in the world, to speak out against injustice, and to create environments where the vulnerable are protected and respected. Furthermore, it reminds us that unchecked desires, fueled by selfishness and a disregard for God's law, inevitably lead to destruction and sorrow, both for the perpetrator and the victim.

#### Questions for Reflection
* **How does Tamar's appeal to "my brother" and "no such thing ought to be done in Israel" speak to the importance of familial bonds and communal moral standards today?**
* **What are the contemporary "follies" or morally reprehensible acts that we, as individuals and as a society, might be prone to overlook or excuse?**
* **How can we, as followers of Christ, actively work to protect the vulnerable and speak out against injustice and abuse of power in our communities?**
* **In what ways does this narrative challenge us to examine our own desires and ensure they are submitted to God's will?**

### FAQ
**What does "folly" mean in this context, and why is it significant?**

Answer: In 2 Samuel 13:12, "folly" translates the Hebrew word _nəḇālâ_. This term is far stronger than mere foolishness or a simple mistake. It signifies a morally depraved, outrageous, and disgraceful act that is an abomination in the eyes of God and the community. It implies a gross violation of covenantal standards, bringing public shame and dishonor. Its significance lies in Tamar's use of it to condemn Amnon's intended act as not just a personal offense but a profound transgression against the moral fabric of Israel, echoing its use in other severe contexts like the rape of Dinah in [Genesis 34:7](/genesis/34-7 "Genesis 34:7 - Dinah's Defilement") or the wickedness of the men of Gibeah in [Judges 19:23](/judges/19-23 "Judges 19:23 - The Levite and his Concubine").

**Why didn't Tamar's suggestion to "speak unto the king" (2 Samuel 13:13) prevent the rape?**

Answer: Tamar's desperate suggestion in [2 Samuel 13:13](/2_samuel/13-13 "2 Samuel 13:13 - Tamar's Desperate Suggestion") – that David might permit their marriage – was likely a desperate, last-ditch effort to appeal to Amnon's reason and avoid the rape, rather than a genuine belief that such a union was permissible or probable. Under Mosaic Law, marriage between half-siblings from the same father was forbidden ([Leviticus 18:9](/leviticus/18-9 "Leviticus 18:9 - Laws Against Incest")). Amnon's lust had completely consumed him, overriding any moral sense or familial obligation. He was determined to "force" her, as the text states, indicating that he had no intention of seeking an honorable or lawful path, even if one existed. His immediate response was to overpower her, showing his complete disregard for her words and the law.

### CHRIST-CENTERED FULFILLMENT
The tragic narrative of Amnon and Tamar, culminating in Tamar's desperate plea in 2 Samuel 13:12, powerfully illustrates the pervasive brokenness of humanity and the devastating consequences of sin, even within the chosen lineage of David. It reveals the profound need for a perfect King, one who would not succumb to lust or abuse of power, and who would perfectly uphold justice and righteousness. While David's house was plagued by internal strife and moral failure, foreshadowing the need for a greater deliverer, Jesus Christ stands as the ultimate fulfillment. He is the true [Son of David](/matthew/1-1 "Matthew 1:1 - Genealogy of Jesus"), yet without sin ([Hebrews 4:15](/hebrews/4-15 "Hebrews 4:15 - Jesus, Our High Priest, Tempted Yet Sinless")). Where Amnon used His power for selfish gratification and violence, Christ used His divine authority to serve, heal, and ultimately sacrifice Himself for the sake of others ([Mark 10:45](/mark/10-45 "Mark 10:45 - The Son of Man Came to Serve")). The "folly" and moral depravity that marred David's family find their antithesis in Christ's perfect obedience and His establishment of a new covenant where true righteousness and purity are possible through His atoning work ([2 Corinthians 5:21](/2_corinthians/5-21 "2 Corinthians 5:21 - Christ Became Sin for Us")). He is the one who brings true justice and healing to the brokenhearted, offering redemption from the very sins that destroyed Amnon and devastated Tamar ([Isaiah 61:1](/isaiah/61-1 "Isaiah 61:1 - The Spirit of the Lord is Upon Me")).

Note: Commentary is generated by AI with a directive for Biblical fidelity. Always rely on the Holy Spirit for discernment. The Scripture text and cross-references are from verified, non-AI sources.

Cross-References

Judges 19:23

And the man, the master of the house, went out unto them, and said unto them, Nay, my brethren, [nay], I pray you, do not [so] wickedly; seeing that this man is come into mine house, do not this folly.

Judges 20:6

And I took my concubine, and cut her in pieces, and sent her throughout all the country of the inheritance of Israel: for they have committed lewdness and folly in Israel.

Leviticus 20:17

And if a man shall take his sister, his father's daughter, or his mother's daughter, and see her nakedness, and she see his nakedness; it [is] a wicked thing; and they shall be cut off in the sight of their people: he hath uncovered his sister's nakedness; he shall bear his iniquity.

Genesis 34:7

And the sons of Jacob came out of the field when they heard [it]: and the men were grieved, and they were very wroth, because he had wrought folly in Israel in lying with Jacob's daughter; which thing ought not to be done.

Leviticus 18:11

The nakedness of thy father's wife's daughter, begotten of thy father, she [is] thy sister, thou shalt not uncover her nakedness.

Leviticus 18:9

The nakedness of thy sister, the daughter of thy father, or daughter of thy mother, [whether she be] born at home, or born abroad, [even] their nakedness thou shalt not uncover.

Genesis 34:2

And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her, he took her, and lay with her, and defiled her.