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Commentary on 1 Samuel 18 verses 12–30
Saul had now, in effect, proclaimed war with David. He began in open hostility when he threw the javelin at him. Now we are here told how his enmity proceeded, and how David received the attacks of it.
I. See how Saul expressed his malice against David. 1. He was afraid of him, Sa1 18:12. Perhaps he pretended to be afraid that David would do himself mischief, to force his way to the crown. Those that design ill against others are commonly willing to have it thought that others design ill against them. But David's withdrawal (Sa1 18:11) was a plain evidence that he was far from such a thought. However, he really stood in awe of him, as Herod feared John, Mar 6:20. Saul was sensible that he had lost the favourable presence of God himself, and that David had it, and for this reason he feared him. Note, Those are truly great and to be reverenced that have God with them. The more wisely David behaved himself the more Saul feared him, Sa1 18:15, and again Sa1 18:29. Men think the way to be feared is to hector and threaten, which makes them feared by fools only, but despised by the wise and good; whereas the way to be both feared and loved, feared by those to whom we would wish to be a terror and loved by those to whom we would wish to be a delight, is to behave ourselves wisely. Wisdom makes the face to shine and commands respect. 2. He removed him from court, and gave him a regiment in the country, Sa1 18:13. He made him captain over 1000, that he might be from under his eye, because he hated the sight of him; and that he might not secure the interest of the courtiers. Yet herein he did impolitely; for it gave David an opportunity of ingratiating himself with the people, who therefore loved him (Sa1 18:16) because he went out and came in before them, that is, he presided in the business of his country, civil as well as military, and have universal satisfaction. 3. He stirred him up to take all occasions of quarrelling with the Philistines and engaging them (Sa1 18:17), insinuating to him that hereby he would do good service to his prince (be thou valiant for me), and good service to his God (fight the Lord's battles), and a kindness to himself too, for hereby he would qualify himself for the honour he designed him, which was to marry his eldest daughter to him. This he had merited by killing Goliath, for it was promised by proclamation to him that should do that exploit (Sa1 17:25); but David was so modest as not to demand it, and now, when Saul proposed it, it was with design of mischief to him, to make him venture upon hazardous attempts, saying in his heart, Let the hand of the Philistines be upon him, hoping that he would some time or other be the death of him; yet how could he expect this when he saw that God was with him? 4. He did what he could to provoke him to discontent and mutiny, by breaking his promise with him, and giving his daughter to another when the time came that she should have been given to him, Sa1 18:19. This was as great an affront as he could possibly put upon him, and touched him both in his honour and in his love. He therefore thought David's resentment of it would break out in some indecency or other, in word or deed, which might give him an advantage against him to take him off by the course of law. Thus evil men seek mischief. 5. When he was disappointed in his, he proffered him his other daughter (who it seems had a secret kindness for David, Sa1 18:20), but with this design, that she might be a snare to him, Sa1 18:21. (1.) Perhaps he hoped that she would, even after her marriage to David, take part with her father against her husband, and give him an opportunity of doing David an unkindness. However, (2.) The conditions of the marriage, he hoped, would be his destruction; for (so zealous will Saul seem against the Philistines) the conditions of the marriage must be that he killed 100 Philistines, and, as proofs that those he had slain were uncircumcised, he must bring in their foreskins cut off; this would be a just reproach upon the Philistines, who hated circumcision as it was an ordinance of God; and perhaps David, in doing this, would the more exasperate them against him, and make them seek to be revenged on him, which was the thing that Saul desired and designed, much more than to be avenged on the Philistines: For Saul thought to make David fall by the Philistines, Sa1 18:25. See here, [1.] What cheats bad men put upon themselves. Saul's conscience would not suffer him, except when the evil spirit was actually upon him, to aim at David's life himself, for even he could not but conceive a horror at the thought of murdering such an innocent and excellent person; but he thought that to expose him designedly to the Philistines had nothing bad in it (Let not my hand be upon him, but the hand of the Philistines), whereas that malicious design against him was as truly murder before God as if he had slain him with his own hands. [2.] What cheats they put upon the world. Saul pretended extraordinary kindness for David even when he aimed at his ruin, and was actually plotting it: Thou shalt be my son-in-law, says he (Sa1 18:21), notwithstanding he hated him implacably. Perhaps David refers to this when (Psa 55:21) he speaks of his enemy as one whose words were smoother than butter, but war was in his heart. It is probable that Saul's employing his servants to persuade David to enter into a treaty of a match with his daughter Michal (Sa1 18:22) arose from an apprehension that either his having cheated him about his elder daughter (Sa1 18:19) or the hardness of the terms he intended now to propose would make him decline it.
II. See how David conducted himself when the tide of Saul's displeasure ran thus high against him.
1.He behaved himself wisely in all his ways. He perceived Saul's jealousy of him, which made him very cautious and circumspect in every thing he said and did, and careful to give no offence. He did not complain of hard measure more make himself the head of a party, but managed all the affairs he was entrusted with as one that made it his business to do real service to his king and country, looking upon that to be the end of his preferment. And then the Lord was with him to give him success in all his undertakings. Though he procured Saul's ill-will by it, yet he obtained God's favour. Compare this with Psa 101:2, where it is David's promise, I will behave myself wisely; and that promise he here performed; and it is his prayer, O, when wilt thou come unto me? And that prayer God here answered: The Lord was with him. However blind fortune may seem to favour fools, God will own and bless those that behave themselves wisely.
2.When it was proposed to him to be son-in-law to the king he once and again received the proposal with all possible modesty and humility. When Saul proposed his elder daughter to him (Sa1 18:18) he said, Who am I, and what is my life? When the courtier proposed the younger, he took no notice of the affront Saul had put upon him in disposing of the elder from him, but continued in the same mind (Sa1 18:23): Seemeth it a light thing to you to be a king's son-in-law, seeing that I am a poor man and lightly esteemed? He knew Michal loved him, and yet did not offer to improve his interest in her affections for the gaining of her without her father's consent, but waited till it was proposed to him. And then see, (1.) How highly he speaks of the honour offered him: To be son-in-law to the king. Though his king was but an upstart, in his original as mean as himself, in his management no better than he should be, yet, being a crowned head, he speaks of him and the royal family with all due respect. Note, Religion is so far from teaching us to be rude and unmannerly that it does not allow us to be so. We must render honour to whom honour is due. (2.) How humbly he speaks of himself: Who am I? This did not proceed from a mean, abject, sneaking spirit, for when there was occasion he made it appear that he had as high a sense of honour as most men; nor was it from his jealousy of Saul (though he had reason enough to fear a snake under the green grass), but from him true and deep humility: Who am I, a poor man, and lightly esteemed? David had as much reason as any man to value himself. He was of an ancient and honourable family of Judah, a comely person, a great statesman and soldier; his achievements were great, for he had won Goliath's head and Michal's heart. He knew himself destined by the divine counsels to the throne of Israel, and yet, Whom am I, and what is my life? Note, It well becomes us, however God has advanced us, always to have low thoughts of ourselves. He that humbleth himself shall be exalted. And, if David thus magnified the honour of being son-in-law to the king, how should we magnify the honour of being sons (not in law, but in gospel) to the King of kings! Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed upon us! Who are we that we should be thus dignified?
3.When the slaying of 100 Philistines was made the condition of David's marrying Saul's daughter he readily closed with it (Sa1 18:26): It pleased David well to be the king's son-in-law upon those terms; and, before the time given him for the action had expired, he doubled the demand, and slew 200, Sa1 18:27. He would not seem to suspect that Saul designed his hurt by it (though he had reason enough), but would rather act as if Saul had meant to consult his honour, and therefore cheerfully undertook it, as became a brave soldier and a true lover, though we may suppose it uneasy to Michal. David hereby discovered likewise, (1.) A great confidence in the divine protection. He knew God was with him, and therefore, whatever Saul hoped, David did not fear falling by the Philistines, though he must needs expose himself much by such an undertaking as this. (2.) A great zeal for the good of his country, which he would not decline any occasion of doing service to, though with the hazard of his life. (3.) A right notion of honour, which consists not so much in being preferred as in deserving to be so. David was then pleased with the thoughts of being the king's son-in-law when he found the honour set at this high price, being more solicitous how to merit it than how to obtain it; nor could he wear it with satisfaction till he had won it.
4.Even after he was married he continued his good services to Israel. When the princes of the Philistines began to move towards another war David was ready to oppose them, and behaved himself more wisely than all the servants of Saul, Sa1 18:30. The law dispensed with men from going to war the first year after they were married (Deu 24:5), but David loved his country too well to make use of that dispensation. Many that have shown themselves forward to serve the public when they have been in pursuit of preferment have declined it when they have gained their point; but David acted from more generous principles.
III. Observe how God brought good to David out of Saul's project against him. 1. Saul gave him his daughter to be a snare to him, but in this respect that marriage was a kindness to him, that his being Saul's son-in-law made his succeeding him much the less invidious, especially when so many of his sons were slain with him, Sa1 31:2. 2. Saul thought, by putting him upon dangerous services, to have him taken off, but that very thing confirmed his interest in the people; for the more he did against the Philistines the better they loved him, so that his name was much set by (Sa1 18:30), which would make his coming to the crown the more easy. Thus God makes even the wrath of man to praise him and serves his designs of kindness to his own people by it.
David said to Saul: Who am I? etc. He does not confess himself unworthy to become the king's son-in-law, but he proposes to make it known and remembered by the same king, who he is, what his life is, what the lineage of his father is in Israel; and from this it is to be inferred whether he is worthy to receive the daughter. He himself is strong in hand, accomplished in act, and desirable in appearance: he feeds his father's sheep, and in caring for them, faces lions and bears to kill them, and also for the salvation of his people, goes out to give his life to danger against the giant armed with bronze and iron. The lineage of his father in Israel is that to which the same Israel blessed, saying among other things: The scepter shall not depart from Judah, nor the ruler's staff from between his feet, until he comes to whom it belongs (Gen. XLIX). This in the same order can be interpreted of the Lord, because he did not deny himself worthy, who would join to himself the people generated by the royal descent through the teaching of the law, in the bond of unanimous peace and charity, concerning whom his herald proclaimed: The one who has the bride is the bridegroom (John III). But also for those coming to his faith, it must be asked who he is, what his life is, what the lineage of his father is in Israel; and from this it is to be understood that he, indeed he alone, is worthy to unite the Church of the faithful to himself by the right of a bridegroom. He himself is the one about whom John writes: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God (John I), and others, up to what he says: And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw his glory, the glory as of the Only Begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth. His life is, of which he himself speaks: For as the Father has life in himself, so he has given to the Son to have life in himself (John V). His life is such that the apostle Peter, urging his listeners to imitate it, says: He committed no sin, nor was deceit found in his mouth. When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, and others (I Pet. II). The lineage of his Father in Israel is that of which: The Lord swore to David a truth, and he will not turn from it: Of the fruit of your body I will set upon your throne (Psalm. CXXXI). The lineage of his Father, of which he himself testifies: For whoever does the will of my Father who is in heaven, he is my brother, and sister, and mother (Matt. VII). Therefore, the Lord did not refuse to be the bridegroom of the Church, that is, Christ; but it is to be sought and understood that he is. Finally, he teaches the Pharisees with the testimony of the proposed Psalm, how the Christ can be both the son and the lord of David, questioning, not denying that he is Christ, but rather arousing them to ask, seek, and knock for the recognition of the truth. And elsewhere he responds to the scribe who called him good teacher, and asked about doing good: Why do you call me good? No one is good except God alone (Mark X); not meaning there that he is not good, but implying that he is to be believed as God.
As [David] looks on the greatness of God’s lovingkindness, he is struck with amazement. He considers himself with all his soul to be unworthy of the vision of such goodness and does not wish to look closely at them or fully understand them. He is constrained by trembling, fear and reverence to cry, “Who am I, Lord, and what is my father’s house, that you should reveal such mysteries to me, unworthy as I am, and have wondrously made me not only to have a vision of such good things, but even to participate and share in them!”
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SUMMARY
1 Samuel 18:18 presents David's profound expression of humility and self-effacement in response to King Saul's unexpected offer of his elder daughter, Merab, in marriage. Despite David's recent heroic triumph over Goliath and his burgeoning popularity among the people, he does not view himself or his family as possessing the requisite social standing or inherent worthiness for such a prestigious royal connection. His rhetorical questions underscore a genuine sense of unworthiness, highlighting the vast social and familial chasm between his humble background as a shepherd from Bethlehem and the esteemed position of the king's son-in-law. This verse serves as a powerful testament to David's character, standing in stark contrast to the pride and insecurity that would increasingly characterize King Saul.
CONTEXT
EXPOSITION AND ANALYSIS
Key Word Analysis
Verse Breakdown
Literary Devices
The primary literary device employed in 1 Samuel 18:18 is Rhetorical Question. David poses a series of questions ("Who am I? and what is my life, [or] my father's family in Israel, that I should be son in law to the king?") not to elicit information, but to emphasize his profound humility and perceived unworthiness. These questions serve to highlight the vast social disparity between David's humble origins and the king's exalted status, underscoring the extraordinary and seemingly unfathomable nature of Saul's offer. The use of Parallelism is also evident in the structure of David's questions, where "Who am I?" is paralleled with "what is my life, [or] my father's family in Israel," creating a cumulative effect that reinforces his self-abasement and deep sense of inadequacy for such an honor. This literary technique effectively communicates David's genuine character and contrasts it with the increasing pride and insecurity that would come to define Saul.
THEOLOGICAL AND THEMATIC CONNECTIONS
David's profound humility in 1 Samuel 18:18 stands as a significant theological statement, illustrating that true greatness in God's eyes often stems from a humble spirit, rather than worldly status or self-promotion. His response implicitly acknowledges God's sovereign hand in his life, recognizing that any elevation he experiences is due to divine favor, not his own merit or family standing. This perspective aligns with a core biblical theme: God often chooses the lowly, the overlooked, and the seemingly insignificant to accomplish His grand purposes, confounding the wisdom and expectations of the world. David's humility here is a hallmark of his character, distinguishing him from Saul, whose pride ultimately leads to his downfall. It teaches us that genuine humility is not self-deprecation but a realistic appraisal of oneself in light of God's sovereignty and grace, fostering a heart that is receptive to divine leading and less prone to the pitfalls of arrogance.
REFLECTION AND APPLICATION
David's response in 1 Samuel 18:18 offers a timeless model of humility, especially pertinent in an age that often glorifies self-promotion, personal branding, and achievement as the ultimate measures of worth. Despite his recent monumental victory over Goliath and the widespread adulation he received, David remained remarkably grounded, recognizing that his worth and opportunities did not stem from his own accomplishments, lineage, or inherent greatness, but solely from God's unmerited favor. This verse challenges us to cultivate a similar spirit in our own lives, urging us to remember our origins and to acknowledge that any blessings, successes, or elevated positions we attain are ultimately gifts from God. True humility allows us to receive honor without arrogance and to serve without seeking personal glory, fostering a deep sense of gratitude and dependence on the divine. It encourages us to see ourselves accurately in relation to God's immense power and grace, preventing pride from taking root and distorting our perspective, and instead nurturing a heart that gives all glory to God.
Questions for Reflection
FAQ
Was David's humility genuine, or was it a form of false modesty or political maneuvering to appear humble before the king?
Answer: While it is impossible to definitively know the innermost thoughts of a historical figure, the consistent portrayal of David throughout the biblical narrative, especially in stark contrast to Saul's increasing pride and insecurity, strongly suggests his humility was genuine. David's repeated expressions of dependence on God (e.g., his trust in God against Goliath in 1 Samuel 17:37) and his later actions, such as his deep repentance after sin (e.g., 2 Samuel 12:13), indicate a heart that genuinely recognized its own limitations and God's absolute sovereignty. In ancient Near Eastern cultures, such expressions of humility before a superior were also culturally appropriate, but David's consistent character reinforces the sincerity of his words here. He genuinely perceived the vast social chasm and the unlikelihood of such an offer given his humble background and family standing.
CHRIST-CENTERED FULFILLMENT
David's profound humility in 1 Samuel 18:18, where he declares his unworthiness to be "son in law to the king," powerfully foreshadows the ultimate and perfect humility of Christ. While David was a humble shepherd elevated by God's choice, Jesus, the eternal Son of God, truly emptied Himself, taking on the form of a servant and being born in the likeness of men (Philippians 2:6-8). He, who was truly divine and possessed all the rights and glory of God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped or exploited, but made Himself nothing. The King of Kings and Lord of Lords, who had every right to the highest honor and adoration, chose the lowest place, born in a humble manger, living a life of selfless service, and ultimately dying a criminal's death on a cross. David's rhetorical question, "Who am I?", finds its ultimate answer and divine reversal in Christ, who, though infinitely worthy, humbled Himself to become the "Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world" (John 1:29). Through His profound humility, perfect obedience, and sacrificial death, Jesus became the true "Son of David" (Matthew 1:1) and the ultimate King, inviting all who humble themselves to become "children of God" (John 1:12) and co-heirs with Him in His glorious kingdom (Romans 8:17).