TRV
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Commentary on Proverbs 23 verses 19–28
Here is good advice for parents to give to their children; words are put into their mouths, that they may train them up in the way they should go. Here we have,
I. An earnest call to young people to attend to the advice of their godly parents, not only to this that is here given, but to all other profitable instructions: "Here, my son, and be wise, Pro 23:19. This will be an evidence that thou art wise and a means to make thee wiser." Wisdom, as faith, comes by hearing. And again (Pro 23:22): "Hearken unto thy father who begot thee, and who therefore has an authority over thee and an affection for thee, and, thou mayest be sure, can have no other design than thy own good." We ought to give reverence to the fathers of our flesh, who begot us, and were the instruments of our being; much more ought we to obey and be in subjection to the Father of our spirits, who made us and is the author of our being. And since the mother also, from a sense of duty to God and from love to her child, gives him good instructions, let him not despise her, nor her advice, when she is old. When the mother was grown old we may suppose the children to be grown up; but let them not think themselves past being taught, even by her, but rather respect her the more for the multitude of her years and the wisdom which they teach. Scornful and insolent young men will make a jest, it may be, of the good advice of an aged mother, and think themselves not concerned to heed what an old woman says; but such will have a great deal to answer for another day, not only as having set at nought good counsel, but as having slighted and grieved a good mother, Pro 30:17.
II. An argument to enforce this call, taken from the great comfort which this will be to their parents, Pro 23:24, Pro 23:25. Note, 1. It is the duty of children to study how they may gladden the hearts of their good parents, and do it yet more and more, so that they may greatly rejoice in them, even when the evil days come and the years of which they say they have no pleasure in them but this, to see their children do well, as Barzillai to see Chimham preferred. 2. Children will be a joy to their parents if they be righteous and wise. Righteousness is true wisdom; those who do good so well for themselves. Those are completely such as they should be who are not only wise (that is, knowing and learned), but righteous (that is, honest and good), and not only righteous (that is, conscientious and well-meaning), but wise (that is, prudent and discreet) in the management of themselves. If such the children be, especially all the children, the father and mother will be glad, and think nothing too much that they have done, or do, for them; they will please themselves in them, and give God thanks for them; particularly she that bore them with pain, and nursed them with pains, will rejoice in them, and reckon herself well requited, and the sorrow more than forgotten, because a wise and good man is the product of it, who is a blessing to the world he was born into.
III. Some general precepts of wisdom and virtue.
1.Guide thy heart in the way, Pro 23:19. It is the heart that must be taken care of and directed aright; the motions and affections of the soul must be towards right objects and under a steady guidance. If the heart be guided in the way, the steps will be guided and the conversation well ordered.
2.Buy the truth and sell it not, Pro 23:23. Truth is that by which the heart must be guided and governed, for without truth there is no goodness; no regular practices without right principles. It is by the power of truth, known and believed, that we must be kept back from sin and constrained to duty. The understanding must be well-informed with wisdom and instruction, and therefore, (1.) We must buy it, that is, be willing to part with any thing for it. He does not say at what rate we must buy it, because we cannot buy it too dear, but must have it at any rate; whatever it costs us, we shall not repent the bargain. When we are at expense for the means of knowledge, and resolved not to starve so good a cause, then we buy the truth. Riches should be employed for the getting of knowledge, rather than knowledge for the getting of riches. When we are at pains in searching after truth, that we may come to the knowledge of it and may distinguish between it and error, then we buy it. Dii laboribus omnia vendunt - Heaven concedes every thing to the laborious. When we choose rather to suffer loss in our temporal interest than to deny or neglect the truth they we buy it; and it is a pearl of such great price that we must be willing to part with all to purchase it, must make shipwreck of estate, trade, preferment, rather than of faith and a good conscience. (2.) We must not sell it. Do not part with it for pleasures, honours, riches, any things in this world. Do not neglect the study of it, nor throw off the profession of it, nor revolt from under the dominion of it, for the getting or saving of any secular interest whatsoever. Hold fast the form of sound words, and never let it go upon any terms.
3.Give my thy heart, Pro 23:26. God in this exhortation, speaks to us as unto children: "Son, Daughter, Give my thy heart." The heart is that which the great God requires and calls for from every one of us; whatever we give, if we do not give him our hearts, it will not be accepted. We must set our love upon him. Our thoughts must converse much with him, and on him, as our highest end. The intents of our hearts must be fastened. We must make it our own act and deed to devote ourselves to the Lord, and we must be free and cheerful in it. We must not think to divide the heart between God and the world; he will have all or none. Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart. To this call we must readily answer, "My father, take my heart, such as it is, and make it such as it should be; take possession of it, and set up thy throne in it."
4.Let thy eyes observe my ways; have an eye to the rule of God's word, the conduct of his providence, and the good examples of his people. Our eyes must observe these, as he that writes observes his copy, that we may keep in the right paths and may proceed and persevere in them.
IV. Some particular cautions against those sins which are, of all sins, the most destructive to the seeds of wisdom and grace in the soul, which impoverish and ruin it. 1. Gluttony and drunkenness, Pro 23:20, Pro 23:21. The world is full of examples of this sin and temptations to it, which all young people are concerned to stand upon their guard against and keep at a distance from Be not a wine-bibber; we are allowed to drink a little wine (Ti1 5:23), but not much, not to make a trade of it, never to drink to excess. Be not a riotous eater of flesh, as the Israelites were, who lusted exceedingly after it, saying, Who will give us flesh to eat? Whereas Paul, though he is free to eat flesh, yet resolves that he will eat no flesh while the world stands rather than make his brother to offend; so indifferent is he to it, Co1 8:13. Be not an excessive eater of flesh. Intemperance must be avoided in meat as well as drink. Be not a luxurious eater of flesh, not pleased with any thing but what is very nice and delicate, savoury dishes, and forced meat. Some take not only a pleasure, but a pride, in being curious about their diet, and, as they call it, eating well; as if that were the ornament of a gentleman, which is really the shame of a Christian, making a God of the belly. "Be not a wine bibber, and be not a riotous eater; and therefore, be not among wine-bibbers nor among riotous eaters; do not give them countenance, lest thou learn their ways and insensibly fall into those sins, or at least lose the dread and detestation of them. They covet to have thee among them; for those that are debauched themselves are very desirous to debauch others; therefore do not gratify them, lest thou endanger thyself." He fetches an argument against this sin from the expensiveness of it and its tendency to impoverish men: and if men will not be deterred from it by the ruin it brings on their secular interests, which lie nearest their hearts, no marvel that they are not frightened from it by what they are told out of the word of God of the mischief it does them in their spiritual and eternal concerns. The drunkard and the glutton hate to be reformed, though they are told they shall come to poverty, nay, though they are told they shall come to hell. Drunkenness is the cause of drowsiness; it stupefies men, and makes them inattentive to business, and then all goes to wreck and ruin: thus men that have lived creditably come to be clothed with rags. 2. Whoredom. This is another sin which takes away the heart that should be given to God, Hos 4:11. He shows the danger which attends that sin, Pro 23:27, Pro 23:28, (1.) It is a sin from which few recover themselves when once they are entangled in it. It is like a deep ditch and a narrow pit, which it is almost impossible to get out of; and therefore it is wisdom to keep far enough from the brink of it. Take heed of making any approaches towards this sin, because it is so hard to make a retreat from it, conscience, which should head the retreat, being debauched by it, and divine grace forfeited. (2.) It is a sin which bewitches men to their ruin: The adulteress lies in wait as a robber, pretending friendship, but designing the greatest mischief, to rob them of all they have that is valuable, to strip them both of their armour and of their ornaments. Even those who, being virtuously educated, endeavour to shun the adulteress, she will lie in wait for, that she may assault them when they are off their guard and she has them at an advantage. Let none therefore be at any time secure. (3.) It is a sin that contributes more than any other to the spreading of vice and immorality in a kingdom: It increases the transgressors among men. One adulteress may be the ruin of many a precious soul and may help to debauch a whole town. It increases the treacherous or perfidious ones; it not only occasions husbands to be false to their wives and servants to their masters, but many that have professed religion to throw off their profession and break their covenants with God. Houses of uncleanness are therefore such pest-houses as ought to be suppressed by those whose office it is to take care of the public welfare.
If you don’t give yourself, you will lose yourself. Charity herself speaks through wisdom and tells you something to save you from panicking at being told, “Give yourself.” If anyone wanted to sell you a farm he would say to you, “Give me your gold,” and if it was something else, “Give me your coppers,” “Give me your silver.” Now listen to what charity says to you, speaking through the mouth of wisdom: “Give me your heart, son. Give me,” she says. Give her what? “Your heart, son.” It was ill when it was with you, when you kept it to yourself. You were being pulled this way and that by toys and trifles and wanton, destructive loves. Take your heart away from all that. Where are you to drag it to, where are you to put it? “Give me your heart,” she says. “Let it be mine, and it won’t be lost to you.”
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SUMMARY
Proverbs 23:26 presents an earnest and profound appeal from a wise instructor to a "son" or disciple, urging a complete and unreserved surrender of the inner self—the will, intellect, and affections—to the path of wisdom. Simultaneously, it calls for diligent and discerning observation of the teacher's righteous ways, emphasizing that true wisdom is not merely intellectual assent but a holistic commitment that transforms both the heart and outward conduct, leading to a life aligned with divine principles.
CONTEXT
EXPOSITION AND ANALYSIS
Key Word Analysis
Verse Breakdown
Literary Devices
Proverbs 23:26 masterfully employs several literary devices to convey its profound message. The most prominent is Metonymy, where "heart" (the seat of inner life) stands for the entire inner person—intellect, will, and emotions—and "eyes" (organs of sight) represent careful observation, discernment, and active learning. The verse also utilizes Parallelism, specifically synthetic parallelism, where the second clause ("and let thine eyes observe my ways") expands upon and completes the thought of the first ("My son, give me thine heart"), emphasizing the complementary nature of internal commitment and external conduct. The direct address "My son" and the imperative verbs ("give," "let...observe") create a tone of Direct Instruction and Urgency, characteristic of sapiential literature, underscoring the authoritative and vital nature of the wisdom being imparted.
THEOLOGICAL AND THEMATIC CONNECTIONS
Proverbs 23:26 articulates a profound theological truth: genuine wisdom and righteous living stem from a holistic commitment that encompasses both the inner being and outward conduct. The call for the "heart" signifies that God desires not just outward adherence to rules, but a deep, internal surrender of one's entire self—intellect, will, and emotions—to His truth. The "ways" of the wise teacher ultimately reflect God's own righteous paths, making this verse an invitation to align one's entire life with divine wisdom and righteousness. It highlights the biblical principle that true transformation is comprehensive, impacting both the hidden motivations of the heart and the visible actions of life, demonstrating that genuine faith is active and discernible.
REFLECTION AND APPLICATION
Proverbs 23:26 serves as a timeless and deeply personal challenge for every individual navigating the complexities of life. It compels us to honestly examine the true object of our allegiance: to whom or what have we truly given our heart? In a world saturated with distractions, competing ideologies, and self-serving desires, this verse reminds us that authentic wisdom and a flourishing life are rooted in an undivided, singular devotion. It's not enough to intellectually acknowledge truth; we are called to surrender our deepest affections, our will, and our very identity to the divine. Furthermore, the command to "let thine eyes observe my ways" urges us to actively seek out and diligently emulate righteous examples, whether found in the timeless wisdom of Scripture, in the lives of godly mentors, or, most perfectly, in the person and life of Jesus Christ. This dual emphasis on internal commitment and external emulation provides a robust framework for spiritual growth, challenging us to live with integrity, where our innermost convictions are consistently and authentically expressed in our outward conduct.
Questions for Reflection
FAQ
What is the significance of the "heart" in this verse, and why is it asked for?
Answer: In ancient Hebrew thought, the "heart" (H3820, lêb) is far more than just the seat of emotions. It encompasses the entire inner person: the intellect (where thoughts and understanding reside), the will (where decisions are made), and the emotions (where affections and desires originate). To "give thine heart" means to surrender one's entire inner being—one's core identity, motivations, and decision-making faculties—to the instruction of wisdom. It is asked for because true wisdom and righteous living must originate from an internal, wholehearted commitment, as highlighted in Proverbs 4:23, which states, "Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life."
Who is the "my son" and "me" in this proverb, and what does their relationship imply?
Answer: The "my son" (H1121, bên) typically refers to a student or disciple, often addressed by a wise teacher or father. The "me" refers to this wise instructor, who embodies and transmits divine wisdom. While the immediate context is a human teacher, the wisdom imparted ultimately originates from God, making the instruction implicitly divine. This pedagogical relationship is central to the transmission of wisdom throughout the Book of Proverbs, emphasizing authority, affection, and the expectation of respectful obedience and emulation from the student.
How does "observing ways" relate to "giving the heart" in this proverb?
Answer: "Observing ways" (H5341, nâtsar, and H1870, derek) signifies diligent attention, careful emulation, and practical obedience to the wise instructor's principles and lifestyle. It is the outward manifestation and practical consequence of the inward surrender of the heart. The two clauses are complementary: a heart fully given to wisdom will naturally lead to eyes that carefully observe and follow righteous paths. It implies that true wisdom is not just theoretical knowledge but lived experience, demonstrating that internal conviction must translate into external conduct, as emphasized by James 1:22, "But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only."
CHRIST-CENTERED FULFILLMENT
Proverbs 23:26 finds its ultimate and most profound fulfillment in the person and work of Jesus Christ. He is the very embodiment of divine wisdom, the perfect teacher whose "ways" are entirely righteous and whose "heart" was perfectly yielded to the Father's will. When the sage in Proverbs calls for the "son" to give his heart and observe his ways, it powerfully foreshadows the New Testament call to radical discipleship to Christ. Jesus Himself invites us to a complete surrender of our entire being, declaring, "If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me" (Luke 9:23). To give our heart to Christ means to acknowledge Him as Lord, allowing His Spirit to transform our intellect, will, and emotions, making us new creations in Him (2 Corinthians 5:17). His "ways" are the path of truth, grace, and eternal life, and by observing them—through studying His word, emulating His character, and walking in His Spirit—we find the abundant life He promised (John 10:10). The call to "observe my ways" becomes a summons to walk as Christ walked (1 John 2:6), to live out the implications of a heart fully devoted to the One who is "the way, the truth, and the life" (John 14:6).