Matthew 10:37

KJV

He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.

KJV (with Strong's)

He that loveth {G5368} father {G3962} or {G2228} mother {G3384} more than {G5228} me {G1691} is {G2076} not {G3756} worthy {G514} of me {G3450}: and {G2532} he that loveth {G5368} son {G5207} or {G2228} daughter {G2364} more than {G5228} me {G1691} is {G2076} not {G3756} worthy {G514} of me {G3450}.

Complete Jewish Bible

Whoever loves his father or mother more than he loves me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than he loves me is not worthy of me.

Berean Standard Bible

Anyone who loves his father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me;

American Standard Version

He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.

Commentary

### SUMMARY
Matthew 10:37 presents Jesus' radical demand for supreme allegiance from His disciples, declaring that anyone whose love for family—be it father, mother, son, or daughter—surpasses their love for Him is deemed "unworthy" of Him. This challenging statement underscores the absolute priority of Christ in the life of a follower, setting a standard for discipleship that transcends even the most sacred human bonds, requiring an uncompromised devotion that places Him above all earthly affections and loyalties.

### CONTEXT
* **Literary Context:** Matthew 10:37 is situated within Jesus' extensive discourse to His twelve apostles, as He commissions them for their first missionary journey (beginning in [Matthew 10:5](/matthew/10-5 "Matthew 10:5 - Jesus Commissions the Twelve")). This chapter is a foundational teaching on the nature and cost of discipleship, preparing the apostles for the opposition, rejection, and profound sacrifices they would inevitably encounter. Immediately preceding this verse, Jesus speaks of the necessity of confessing Him before men and the potential for division within families due to allegiance to Him, stating He came "not to bring peace, but a sword" ([Matthew 10:34](/matthew/10-34 "Matthew 10:34 - Jesus Brings a Sword")). The verses following Matthew 10:37 continue to elaborate on the demanding nature of true discipleship, including the call to [take up one's cross](/matthew/10-38 "Matthew 10:38 - Taking up the Cross") and the promise of reward for those who welcome His messengers ([Matthew 10:38-42](/matthew/10-38-42 "Matthew 10:38-42 - The Cost and Reward of Discipleship")). Thus, this verse is a pivotal statement within a broader theme of radical commitment and the reordering of loyalties for the sake of the Kingdom.

* **Historical & Cultural Context:** In ancient Jewish society, family was the foundational unit of identity, security, and social structure. Filial piety and honor for parents were deeply ingrained cultural and religious values, explicitly commanded in the [Ten Commandments](/exodus/20-12 "Exodus 20:12 - Honor Your Father and Mother"). To suggest that love for anyone, even God, should supersede love for one's immediate family was profoundly counter-cultural and shocking. Such a statement would have been perceived as a direct challenge to the established social order and familial obligations. Furthermore, during this period, following a rabbi often meant leaving one's family and livelihood to dedicate oneself fully to the teacher's instruction. Jesus' words, therefore, escalate this expectation, demanding an allegiance that surpasses even the most sacred and cherished human relationships, signifying a new, supreme loyalty to Him as the Messiah and the bringer of God's Kingdom.

* **Key Themes:** Matthew 10:37 powerfully contributes to several overarching themes within the Gospel of Matthew and broader biblical theology. Foremost is the theme of **Supreme Allegiance to Christ**, emphasizing that Jesus demands the preeminent place in the heart and life of His followers, above all other loves and loyalties. This is not a negation of the importance of family, but a reordering of priorities, placing Christ as the ultimate foundation from which all other relationships derive their proper context and expression. Closely related is the **Cost of Discipleship**, highlighting that genuine commitment to Jesus often entails profound personal sacrifice, potentially leading to familial division or estrangement, as seen in [Matthew 10:34-36](/matthew/10-34-36 "Matthew 10:34-36 - Division for Christ's Sake"). The verse also touches upon the concept of **Worthiness in the Kingdom**, not as a means of earning salvation, but as a demonstration of a heart fully surrendered to Christ's lordship and the invaluable nature of His call, echoing the call to [seek first the kingdom of God](/matthew/6-33 "Matthew 6:33 - Seek First the Kingdom").

### EXPOSITION AND ANALYSIS

#### Key Word Analysis
* **loveth (Greek, _philéō'_):** From G5368, this term denotes affection, friendship, or fondness, implying a personal attachment based on sentiment or feeling. While often contrasted with _agapáō_ (G25), which signifies a more selfless, volitional, and divine love, in this context, _philéō_ underscores the natural, deep affection one has for family members. Jesus' use of this word here is not to diminish the natural and good love for family, but to challenge its ultimate priority, asserting that even this profound human affection must not supersede devotion to Him.
* **more than (Greek, _hypér'_):** From G5228, this preposition means "over," "above," "beyond," or "superior to." In Matthew 10:37, it functions as a comparative, establishing a clear hierarchy. Jesus is not forbidding love for family but demanding that His place in a disciple's heart be _above_ and _superior_ to all other loves. It signifies a qualitative and quantitative preeminence, where Christ must be the ultimate object of one's deepest affection and loyalty.
* **worthy (Greek, _áxios'_):** From G514, this word means "deserving," "comparable," or "suitable." To be "not worthy of me" (οὐκ ἄξιός ἐστιν) signifies being unfit or unsuitable for a true, committed relationship with Christ as a disciple. It implies an incongruity between one's professed allegiance and their actual priorities. This worthiness is not about earning salvation through works, but about demonstrating the internal disposition and external commitment that aligns with the radical demands of following Jesus and participating in His Kingdom work.

#### Verse Breakdown
* **"He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me:"** This initial clause sets the uncompromising standard for discipleship. Jesus asserts His supreme claim over the most fundamental and revered human relationships. The "love" (Greek, _philéō_) for parents, while natural and commanded elsewhere in Scripture, must not, in terms of ultimate allegiance and priority, exceed one's love for Christ. To prioritize familial affection over Him renders one "not worthy," meaning unsuitable or unfit to be His true disciple and to participate fully in the Kingdom of God. This challenges the deeply ingrained cultural norm of filial piety, placing Christ as the absolute preeminent authority and object of devotion.
* **"and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me."** This second clause reiterates and reinforces the first, extending the principle to one's children. The parallel structure emphasizes the universal and absolute nature of this demand. Love for one's offspring, a profound and protective bond, must also yield to the supreme love for Christ. By including both ascending (parents) and descending (children) familial relationships, Jesus covers the entire spectrum of primary family ties, making it clear that no human relationship, however cherished, can compete with the ultimate loyalty required for genuine discipleship. The consequence remains the same: such misplaced priority renders one "not worthy" of Him.

#### Literary Devices
Matthew 10:37 employs several potent **literary devices** to convey its profound message. The most prominent is **Parallelism**, specifically **Synonymous Parallelism**, where the second clause ("he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me") echoes and reinforces the first ("He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me"). This repetition emphasizes the universal scope of Jesus' demand, covering all primary familial relationships and underscoring the absolute nature of His claim. Another device is **Hyperbole**, a deliberate exaggeration for rhetorical effect. Jesus is not literally advocating for a lack of love for family, but rather using an extreme statement to highlight the *supreme* and *uncompromising* nature of the allegiance He requires. This serves to shock the audience into re-evaluating their deepest loyalties. Finally, there is a strong element of **Contrast**, pitting human love (even sacred familial love) against divine allegiance to Christ. This contrast forces the listener to confront the ultimate priority in their life, demanding a clear choice between competing loyalties.

### THEOLOGICAL AND THEMATIC CONNECTIONS
Matthew 10:37 is a profound theological statement on the nature of discipleship, asserting Christ's absolute sovereignty and demanding an unreserved, primary allegiance that transcends all earthly bonds. It reveals that following Jesus is not merely an add-on to life but a radical reorientation of one's entire being, where the Kingdom of God and the person of Christ become the ultimate center. This does not devalue family but reorders its place, ensuring that love for Christ provides the proper foundation and expression for all other loves. The "worthiness" spoken of is not a merit-based earning of salvation, but a spiritual fitness and suitability for the radical call to follow Jesus, demonstrating that one truly counts the cost and values Him above all else.

* [Luke 14:26](/luke/14-26 "Luke 14:26 - Hating Family for Christ")
* [Philippians 3:7-8](/philippians/3-7-8 "Philippians 3:7-8 - Counting All Things Loss for Christ")
* [Deuteronomy 6:5](/deuteronomy/6-5 "Deuteronomy 6:5 - Love the Lord Your God with All Your Heart")

### REFLECTION AND APPLICATION
Matthew 10:37 stands as a stark and challenging reminder for every believer across generations: Jesus demands absolute preeminence in our lives. In a world that often elevates personal relationships, comfort, or material possessions to ultimate status, this verse calls us to a radical, uncompromised devotion to Christ. It compels us to examine our deepest loyalties and the true priorities that govern our decisions, time, and affections. This does not mean abandoning our families or neglecting our responsibilities towards them; rather, it implies that our love for Christ must be the ultimate foundation from which all other relationships and actions flow. When Christ is truly first, He empowers us to love our families more purely, serve our communities more selflessly, and live out our faith with integrity, guided by His divine wisdom and love. It is a call to a transformed life where our identity and purpose are rooted solely in Him, ensuring that nothing or no one comes between us and our supreme commitment to the Lord and His Kingdom.

#### Questions for Reflection
* **What specific areas of my life or relationships might be competing with my ultimate allegiance to Christ?**
* **How does my daily schedule, financial decisions, or emotional energy reflect my true priorities?**
* **In what ways can I demonstrate a love for Christ that truly surpasses all other loves, without neglecting my responsibilities to family?**
* **What practical steps can I take this week to reorder my priorities to place Christ more firmly at the center?**

### FAQ

**Does this verse mean Jesus wants us to literally "hate" our family, as some other translations (like Luke 14:26) might suggest?**

Answer: No, Jesus is not advocating for a literal hatred or abandonment of family. The language used, particularly in the parallel passage in [Luke 14:26](/luke/14-26 "Luke 14:26 - Hating Family for Christ"), employs a Hebrew idiom where "hate" signifies "to love less" or "to prefer less." In the context of Matthew 10:37, Jesus' statement means that our love and allegiance to Him must be so profoundly superior that, by comparison, our love for even our closest family members should seem like "hate." It's a statement of absolute priority, not emotional aversion. The Bible consistently upholds the importance of family and commands us to [honor our parents](/ephesians/6-2 "Ephesians 6:2 - Honor Your Father and Mother") and [love our neighbors](/mark/12-31 "Mark 12:31 - Love Your Neighbor as Yourself"), which certainly includes our family. Jesus is demanding an uncompromised, supreme devotion that places Him above all other relationships and loyalties.

**How does this verse relate to the commandment to honor father and mother?**

Answer: This verse does not negate the Fifth Commandment to [honor your father and mother](/exodus/20-12 "Exodus 20:12 - Honor Your Father and Mother"). Instead, it places that commandment, and all other human relationships, within the larger framework of one's ultimate devotion to God. Jesus is teaching that while honoring and loving family is vital, it must never supersede our ultimate allegiance to Him. When there is a conflict of loyalties, where following Christ's commands or embracing His truth means going against familial expectations or traditions, Christ must be chosen. True honor and love for family, in a Christian context, ultimately flow from a life submitted to Christ, as He empowers us to love others rightly. The principle is that God's authority and Christ's claim on our lives are supreme, even over deeply cherished human bonds.

### CHRIST-CENTERED FULFILLMENT
Matthew 10:37, with its radical demand for supreme allegiance, finds its ultimate fulfillment and perfect embodiment in the person and work of Jesus Christ Himself. Christ did not merely teach this principle; He perfectly lived it out, demonstrating an unwavering, absolute devotion to the will of His Father that transcended all earthly ties and comforts. His entire life, from His birth to His ministry, and ultimately to His sacrificial death, was a testament to prioritizing divine mission over personal comfort or human affection. He willingly [left His heavenly glory](/philippians/2-6-8 "Philippians 2:6-8 - Christ's Humiliation") to accomplish the Father's will, even when it meant facing rejection and suffering. His ultimate act of love on the cross, where He [gave His life as a ransom for many](/mark/10-45 "Mark 10:45 - The Son of Man Came to Serve"), perfectly illustrates what it means to love God supremely and to count all things as loss for the sake of His redemptive purpose. Therefore, when Jesus calls us to love Him "more than" family, He is not imposing an arbitrary rule but inviting us into the very pattern of His own self-giving life. Our "worthiness" is not earned by our perfect love, but is found in our union with Him, the One who was perfectly worthy, and who empowers us by His Spirit to reorder our loves in conformity to His own supreme love for the Father and for His redeemed people, the Church, His [body](/ephesians/1-22-23 "Ephesians 1:22-23 - The Church as Christ's Body").

Note: Commentary is generated by AI with a directive for Biblical fidelity. Always rely on the Holy Spirit for discernment. The Scripture text and cross-references are from verified, non-AI sources.

Cross-References

Luke 14:26

If any [man] come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.

Matthew 22:37

Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.

Philippians 3:7

But what things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ.

Philippians 3:9

¶ And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith:

2 Corinthians 5:14

For the love of Christ constraineth us; because we thus judge, that if one died for all, then were all dead:

2 Corinthians 5:15

And [that] he died for all, that they which live should not henceforth live unto themselves, but unto him which died for them, and rose again.

Deuteronomy 33:9

Who said unto his father and to his mother, I have not seen him; neither did he acknowledge his brethren, nor knew his own children: for they have observed thy word, and kept thy covenant.