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Study this verse
Public-domain commentary
Matthew Henry
From his Commentary on the Whole Bible. Henry comments on passages, not single verses — this entry covers Proverbs 19:6–7.
These two verses are a comment upon Pro 19:4, and show, 1. How those that are rich and great are courted and caressed, and have suitors and servants in abundance. The prince that has power in his hand, and preferments at his disposal, has his gate and his ante-chamber thronged with petitioners, that are ready to adore him for what they can get. Many will entreat his favour, and think themselves happy in it. Even great men are humble suppliants to the prince. How earnest then should we be for the favour of God, which is far beyond that of any earthly prince. But, it should seem, liberality will go further than majesty itself to gain respect, for there are many that court the prince, but every man is a friend to him that gives gifts; not only those that have received, or do expect, gifts from him, will, as friends, be ready to serve him, but others also will, as friends, give him their good word. Prodigals, who are foolishly free of what they have, will have many hangers-on who will cry them up as long as it lasts, but will leave them when it is done. Those that are prudently generous make an interest by it which may stand them in good stead; those that are accounted benefactors exercise an authority which may give them an opportunity of doing good, Luk 22:25. 2. How those that are poor and low are slighted and despised. Men may, if they please, court the prince, and the princely, but they may not trample upon the poor and look at them with disdain. Yet so it often is: All the brethren of the poor do hate him; even his own relations are shy of him, because he is needy and craving, and expects something from them, and because they look upon him as a blemish to their family; and then no marvel if others of his friends, that were nothing akin to him, go far from him, to get out of his way. He pursues them with words, hoping to prevail with them by his importunity to be kind to him, but all in vain; they have nothing for him. They pursue him with words (so some understand it), to excuse themselves from giving him any thing; they tell him that he is idle and impertinent, that he has brought himself into poverty, and therefore ought not to be relieved; as Nabal said to David's messengers: "There are many servants now a days that run away from their masters; and how do I know but that David may be one of them?" Let poor people therefore make God their friend, pursue him with their prayers, and he will not be wanting to them.
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Summary
Proverbs 19:6 offers a penetrating observation into the pragmatic and often self-serving nature of human relationships, particularly those influenced by power, wealth, and perceived advantage. It highlights the common tendency for individuals to gravitate towards those in positions of authority or affluence, eagerly seeking favor from a "prince" or cultivating "friendships" with those who are generous with their resources. This proverb shrewdly illuminates the transactional undercurrents that frequently characterize human connections in a fallen world, where personal benefit can often eclipse genuine affection, loyalty, or integrity.
Context
Literary Context
Proverbs 19:6 is an integral part of the "Solomonic collection" (Proverbs 10:1-22:16), a substantial segment of the book dedicated to practical wisdom for daily living. This particular proverb functions as a concise aphorism, distilling a keen observation about human social dynamics into a memorable truth. It contributes to a broader tapestry of themes woven throughout Proverbs, including the nature of true versus false friendship, the influence of wealth and poverty, the dangers of flattery, and the responsibilities of leadership. It resonates with other proverbs that expose the conditional loyalty of fair-weather friends, such as the observation that "the poor is hated even of his own neighbour: but the rich hath many friends" in Proverbs 14:20, and the caution against fleeting riches found in Proverbs 23:5.
Historical & Cultural Context
The social fabric of the ancient Near East was significantly shaped by patronage systems. Kings, princes, and other wealthy or influential individuals served as crucial sources of protection, justice, and economic opportunity. Consequently, seeking the "favor" (literally, "face" or "presence") of a ruler was not merely a polite custom but often a strategic necessity for social advancement, the resolution of disputes, or even basic survival. Gifts played a vital role in these interactions, functioning not only as expressions of honor or generosity but frequently as a means to secure influence, express deference, or solidify alliances. The proverb thus reflects a cultural reality where relationships, especially with those in power, were frequently transactional, driven by the desire for tangible benefits rather than purely altruistic motives.
Key Themes
This proverb succinctly encapsulates several enduring themes prevalent in wisdom literature. It vividly illustrates the pervasive nature of transactional relationships, where individuals are primarily motivated by what they can gain from another, rather than inherent value or genuine affection. It powerfully underscores the magnetic influence of wealth and power, demonstrating how those who possess resources or authority naturally attract a multitude of supplicants and "friends." Implicitly, it exposes the inherent human tendency towards self-interest and opportunism, revealing how people gravitate towards perceived sources of advantage. Furthermore, by describing these conditional alliances, the proverb subtly lays the groundwork for a deeper understanding of the crucial distinction between true and false friendship, a theme more fully developed in passages that extol steadfast loyalty, such as Proverbs 17:17 and Proverbs 18:24.
Exposition and Analysis
Key Word Analysis
This word, derived from a root meaning "to abound," signifies abundance in quantity, number, or size. In this context, it emphasizes the sheer multitude or great number of individuals who will engage in the behavior described, highlighting its widespread and common nature. It underscores that this phenomenon is not isolated but a prevalent aspect of human social interaction.
This verb carries a rich semantic range, encompassing concepts of being weak or sick, but also to stroke, flatter, or make fervent supplication. Here, it denotes a persistent, often deferential, and perhaps ingratiating appeal for favor. It suggests a deliberate and earnest effort to gain approval, access, or benefit, often through persuasive or even flattering means, rather than a simple, straightforward request.
Derived from a root meaning "voluntary" or "generous," nâdîyb refers to a noble, a grandee, or a person of high social standing and significant influence. While the root might suggest an inherently noble character, in this context, the term primarily denotes one who holds authority and power, making their favor highly sought after. The focus is on their elevated position and ability to grant benefits, rather than necessarily their moral character.
From the verb nâtan (to give), mattân refers to a present, offering, or reward. In the context of the proverb, these are tangible offerings or benefits bestowed by a wealthy or influential person. The emphasis is on the material nature of what is given, which serves as a powerful magnet for those seeking to establish or maintain a relationship for personal gain and advantage.
Verse Breakdown
"Many will intreat the favour of the prince:"
This opening clause presents a keen observation of human behavior, noting the widespread tendency to seek access, approval, or benefits from those in positions of power. The "prince" (or noble) represents authority, influence, and the capacity to grant or withhold resources. To "intreat favor" implies a persistent, often humble, and potentially flattering approach to gain their positive regard or assistance, underscoring the strategic importance of cultivating relationships with the powerful in ancient society.
"and every man [is] a friend to him that giveth gifts."
This second clause functions as a powerful synonymous parallelism, reinforcing and expanding upon the truth presented in the first. It asserts that generosity, particularly material generosity, naturally attracts a multitude of "friends." The term "friend" here is used with a subtle irony or superficiality, implying that these relationships are often conditional, based on the continued flow of benefits rather than genuine affection, shared values, or deep loyalty. This highlights the magnetic pull of wealth and the self-serving motives that can underpin many human associations.
Literary Devices
Proverbs 19:6 masterfully employs several literary devices to convey its poignant observation about human nature. The most prominent device is Synonymous Parallelism, where the second line of the proverb reiterates and amplifies the truth presented in the first. The act of "intreating the favour of the prince" is paralleled by "every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts," both expressions pointing to the universal human tendency to be drawn to those with power and resources. This structural repetition serves to emphasize the pervasive nature of this behavior. The proverb also functions as an Aphorism or a general Observation, presenting a concise, universally applicable truth about human social dynamics without necessarily endorsing or condemning it, but rather stating a reality. Furthermore, there is a subtle yet potent element of Irony in the use of the word "friend" in the second clause. The "friends" attracted by gifts are frequently not genuine companions but rather opportunists, highlighting the superficiality and conditional nature of relationships built on transactional gain rather than mutual affection or shared values.
Theological and Thematic Connections
Proverbs 19:6, while a pragmatic observation of human society, carries profound theological implications. It starkly exposes the fallen human tendency towards self-interest and the conditional nature of many earthly relationships, standing in sharp contrast to the steadfast and unconditional love of God. Unlike human "princes" whose favor must be entreated, or "givers of gifts" whose "friendship" is sought for gain, God's grace and favor are freely offered to all who seek Him in truth, not based on our merits, our gifts, or our ability to flatter, but solely on His sovereign love and abundant mercy. This proverb serves as a crucial call to spiritual discernment, urging believers to critically evaluate the motives behind human relationships and to ground their ultimate security, identity, and hope not in fleeting human approval or material advantage, but in the immutable character and unfailing provision of the Almighty.
Reflection and Application
Proverbs 19:6 remains strikingly relevant in contemporary society, challenging us to critically examine the nature of our relationships and our own underlying motivations. It serves as a potent reminder that not all who seek our company or offer their "friendship" do so from pure motives; some may indeed be drawn by our perceived power, resources, or influence. This proverb calls us to cultivate profound discernment, urging us to look beyond superficial gestures and evaluate relationships based on character, loyalty, and genuine connection, rather than what can be gained or given. Furthermore, it prompts a vital introspection: do we ourselves fall into the trap of transactional relationships, seeking favor or friendship from others primarily for what they can do for us, or do we value them for who they are, irrespective of their utility? Ultimately, this ancient wisdom encourages us to build our relationships on foundations of integrity, truth, and unconditional love, striving to mirror the character of God rather than adopting the fleeting, self-serving alliances so common in the world.
Questions for Reflection
FAQ
Does this proverb condemn seeking favor or giving gifts?
No, the proverb does not inherently condemn seeking favor or giving gifts. Instead, it functions as a realistic and shrewd observation of human behavior and social dynamics. It describes what is often seen in the world, rather than prescribing what should be. Seeking favor from authority figures or giving gifts can be legitimate and positive actions in appropriate contexts (e.g., expressing gratitude, honoring a leader, building genuine community, or seeking justice). The proverb's wisdom lies in its exposure of the motives behind such actions, particularly the self-serving ones, and the conditional nature of relationships that often arise from them. It serves as a warning against naive trust in relationships based solely on perceived benefit or material exchange.
What is the difference between genuine generosity and giving gifts for influence, as implied by this proverb?
The key difference lies in the underlying motivation and the expected outcome. Genuine generosity, as exemplified throughout Scripture (e.g., 2 Corinthians 9:7), flows from a heart of love, compassion, and a selfless desire to bless others without expectation of return, manipulation, or personal gain. It is unconditional and seeks the well-being of the recipient. Giving gifts for influence, as implied by Proverbs 19:6, is transactional. The giver's primary motive is to gain something—favor, "friendship," power, or advantage—from the recipient. The "friendship" or "favor" cultivated is contingent upon the continued flow of benefits, making it superficial, self-serving, and often fleeting. True generosity builds authentic bonds; giving for influence creates conditional alliances.
Christ-Centered Fulfillment
Proverbs 19:6, with its stark portrayal of transactional human relationships, finds its ultimate contrast and profound fulfillment in the person and work of Jesus Christ. Unlike earthly princes whose favor must be entreated through flattery or gifts, or wealthy individuals whose generosity attracts conditional friends, Jesus, the true Prince of Peace and King of kings, offers His favor and friendship not based on our entreaties, our merits, or any gifts we might offer, but solely on His boundless grace and self-sacrificial love. He did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. His ultimate "gift" was Himself, freely given on the cross, not to gain "friends" who would benefit Him, but to reconcile enemies to God (see Romans 5:8). The "friendship" He offers is unconditional, eternal, and rooted in His covenant faithfulness, not our ability to provide Him with anything. Indeed, He calls His disciples friends because He has revealed all that the Father has taught Him, establishing a profound intimacy that transcends any transactional exchange. His kingdom operates on principles of humble service, radical generosity, and unconditional love, inviting us into a relationship built on grace, not gain, reflecting the divine nature that gives to all life, and breath, and all things.