TRV
“The Question of Divorce”· Matthew 19:3–12
Translation
King James Version
But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given.
Complete Jewish Bible
He said to them, "Not everyone grasps this teaching, only those for whom it is meant.
Berean Standard Bible
“Not everyone can accept this word,” He replied, “but only those to whom it has been given.
American Standard Version
But he said unto them, Not all men can receive this saying, but they to whom it is given.
World English Bible Messianic
But he said to them, ‹“Not all men can receive this saying, but those to whom it is given.
Geneva Bible (1599)
But he sayd vnto them, All men cannot receiue this thing, saue they to whom it is giuen.
Young's Literal Translation
And he said to them, `All do not receive this word, but those to whom it hath been given;
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Historical interpretation
Eleven Centuries of Reception
9 surviving comments on this verse. Each one is dated, so this reads as a timeline rather than a list.
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Concerning the words, "Not all can receive this saying. There are some eunuchs who were born so, and some who were made eunuchs by men, and some who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven; let him receive it who can receive it," they do not realize the context. After his word about divorce some asked him whether, if that is the position in relation to woman, it is better not to marry; and it was then that the Lord said: "Not all can receive this saying, but those to whom it is granted." What the questioners wanted to know was whether, when a man's wife has been condemned for fornication, it is allowable for him to marry another.
The cause in one item he assigns nature; in the next violence, and in the last his own choice, in him, namely, that determined to be so from hope of the kingdom of heaven.
What then saith Christ? He said not, "yea, it is easier, and so do," lest they should suppose that the thing is a law; but He subjoined, "Not all men receive it, but they to whom it is given," raising the thing, and showing that it is great, and in this way drawing them on, and urging them.
But see herein a contradiction. For He indeed saith this is a great thing; but they, that it is easier. For it was meet that both these things should be done, and that it should be at once acknowledged a great thing by Him, that it might render them more forward, and by the things said by themselves it should be shown to be easier, that on this ground too they might the rather choose virginity and continence.
And if it is of free choice, one may say, how doth He say, at the beginning, "All men do not receive it, but they to whom it is given?" That thou mightest learn that the conflict is great, not that thou shouldest suspect any compulsory allotments. For it is given to those, even to the willing.
But He spake thus to show that much influence from above is needed by him who entereth these lists, whereof He that is willing shall surely partake. For it is customary for Him to use this form of speech when the good work done is great, as when He saith, "To you it is given to know the mysteries."
And that this is true, is manifest even from the present instance. For if it be of the gift from above only, and they that live as virgins contribute nothing themselves, for nought did He promise them the kingdom of Heaven, and distinguish them from the other eunuchs.
For it is a lighter thing to contend with himself, and his own lust, than with an evil woman.
Then to show that this is possible, He says, For there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men; as much as to say, Consider, had you been so made of others, you would have lost the pleasure without gaining the reward.
When he says, Who have made themselves eunuchs, He does not mean cutting off of members, but a putting away of evil thoughts. For he that cuts off a limb is under a curse, for such an one undertakes the deeds of murderers, and opens a door to Manicheans who depreciate the creature, and cut off the same members as do the Gentiles. For to cut off members is of the temptation of dæmons. But by the means of which we have spoken desire is not diminished but made more urgent; for it has its source elsewhere, and chiefly in a weak purpose and an unguarded heart, For if the heart be well governed, there is no danger from the natural motions; nor does the amputation of a member bring such peacefulness and immunity from temptation as does a bridle upon the thoughts.
A wife is a grievous burden, if it is not permitted to put her away except for the cause of fornication. For what if she be a drunkard, an evil temper, or of evil habits, is she to be kept? The Apostles, perceiving this burden someness, express what they feel; His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.
But let none think, that wherein He adds, save they to whom it is given, that either fate or fortune is implied, as though they were virgins only whom chance has led to such a fortune. For that is given to those who have sought it of God, who have longed for it, who have striven that they might obtain it.
He speaks of three kinds of eunuchs, of whom two are carnal, and one spiritual. One, those who are so born of their mother's womb; another, those whom enemies or courtly luxury has made so; a third, those who have made themselves so for the kingdom of heaven, and who might have been men, but become eunuchs for Christ. To them the reward is promised, for to the others whose continence was involuntary, nothing is due.
(cf. Orig. in loc.) Or we may say otherwise. The eunuchs from their mothers' wombs are they whose nature is colder, and not prone to lust. And they that are made so of men are they whom physicians made so, or they whom worship of idols has made effeminate, or who from the influence of heretical teaching pretend to chastity, that they may thereupon claim truth for their tenets. But none of them obtain the kingdom of heaven, save he only who has become a eunuch for Christ's sake. Whence it follows, He that is able to receive it, let him receive it; let each calculate his own strength, whether he is able to fulfil the rules of virginity and abstinence. For in itself continence is sweet and alluring, but each man must consider his strength, that he only that is able may receive it. This is the voice of the Lord exhorting and encouraging on His soldiers to the reward of chastity, that he who can fight might fight and conquer and triumph.
(Verse 11.) He said to them: Not everyone can understand this word, but only those to whom it is given. No one should think that under this word, either fate or fortune is introduced: these are the virgins to whom it has been given by God, or whom certain circumstances have brought to this, but it has been given to those who have asked, who have desired, who have worked to receive it. For everyone who asks will receive, and the one who seeks will find, and to the one who knocks, it will be opened (Matthew 7:8 and Luke 11:10).
And the Lord said not, It is good, but rather assented that it is not good. However, He considered the weakness of the flesh; But he said unto them, All cannot receive this saying; that is, All are not able to do this.
But all cannot obtain it, because all do not desire to obtain it. The prize is before them; he who desires the honour will not consider the toil. None would ever vanquish, if all shunned the struggle. Because then some have fallen from their purpose of continence, we ought not therefore to faint from that virtue; for they that fall in the battle do not slay the rest. That He says therefore, Save they to whom it is given, shows that unless we receive the aid of grace, we have not strength. But this aid of grace is not denied to such as seek it, for the Lord says above, Ask, and ye shall receive.
For as the deed without the will does not constitute a sin; so a righteous act is not in the deed unless the will go with it. That therefore is honourable continence, not which mutilation of body of necessity enforces, but which the will of holy purpose embraces.
For they are born such, just as others are born having six or four fingers. For if God according as He formed our bodies in the beginning, had continued the same order unchangeably, the working of God would have been brought into oblivion among men. The order of nature is therefore changed at times from its nature, that God the framer of nature may be had in remembrance.
Since the disciples had said that it would be better not to enter into marriage, the Lord says that virginity is a great thing but not everyone can achieve it, but only those with whom God acts in synergy. "They to whom it is given" refers to those with whom God acts in synergy. It is given to those who ask. For He says, "Ask, and it shall be given you. For everyone that asketh receiveth" (Lk. 11:9).
(ord.) He says this to the terror of him that would take her to wife, for the adulteress would have no fear of disgrace.
Source: Quotations drawn from early Church Fathers and historical Christian theologians (AD 100–1500). Some quotes address the surrounding passage context rather than this verse alone.
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Summary
In Matthew 19:11, Jesus responds to His disciples' incredulity regarding the strictness of His teaching on marriage and divorce. He clarifies that the capacity to embrace and live out a life of celibacy is not a universal human ability or choice, but rather a specific spiritual endowment, a divine gift bestowed by God upon certain individuals for a particular purpose within His kingdom. This statement distinguishes between the normative call to marriage and the specialized calling to singleness, emphasizing divine sovereignty in both.
Context
Literary Context
This verse is a direct response from Jesus to His disciples' reaction in Matthew 19:10. Immediately preceding this, Jesus engaged in a profound discussion with the Pharisees about marriage and divorce, affirming God's original design for marriage as an indissoluble, lifelong union (Matthew 19:3-9). The disciples, finding this teaching exceptionally demanding, concluded, "If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry." Jesus' reply in Matthew 19:11 and the subsequent verse (Matthew 19:12) serves to qualify His earlier statements, indicating that while marriage is the norm, celibacy for the kingdom is a distinct, divinely enabled calling.
Historical & Cultural Context
In ancient Jewish society, marriage and procreation were highly valued and considered normative. Remaining unmarried was generally seen as undesirable, and celibacy was not a common or esteemed spiritual path. The Mosaic Law permitted divorce (Deuteronomy 24:1-4), though its interpretation varied among rabbinic schools. Jesus' teaching on the permanence of marriage was radical for its time, challenging prevailing cultural norms and interpretations of the Law. His subsequent statement in Matthew 19:11 about the "gift" of celibacy was even more counter-cultural, introducing a concept largely foreign to mainstream Jewish thought, where a large family was often seen as a sign of divine blessing.
Key Themes
This verse contributes significantly to several key themes within the Gospel of Matthew and broader New Testament theology. It highlights the Sovereignty of God in gifting individuals for specific callings, whether marriage or celibacy. It underscores the Radical Nature of Kingdom Ethics, demonstrating that allegiance to God's kingdom may call for unconventional life choices, such as celibacy, which are empowered by divine grace. Furthermore, it subtly reinforces the Sanctity of Marriage by presenting celibacy not as a universally accessible alternative, but as a specialized, divinely enabled path for those who cannot "receive this saying" about the demanding nature of marriage. This theme is further developed in 1 Corinthians 7, where Paul discusses both states as legitimate and God-honoring.
Exposition and Analysis
Key Word Analysis
Meaning "to be in (give) space, i.e. (intransitively) to pass, enter, or (transitively) to hold, admit (literally or figuratively)." In this context, it signifies the capacity or ability to grasp, embrace, or live out the demanding implications of Jesus' teaching on marriage, specifically the idea that if marriage is so binding, it might be better not to marry at all. It speaks to a spiritual and practical capacity to remain single.
Meaning "something said (including the thought); by implication, a topic (subject of discourse), also reasoning (the mental faculty) or motive." Here, "this saying" refers to the disciples' conclusion in Matthew 19:10, which was a response to Jesus' own stringent teaching on the indissoluble nature of marriage. It encapsulates the challenging truth about the permanence of the marital bond and the subsequent implication that celibacy might be preferable.
A prolonged form of a primary verb meaning "to give (used in a very wide application, properly, or by implication, literally or figuratively; greatly modified by the connection)." The passive voice ("it is given") indicates a divine agent. This highlights that the capacity for celibacy is not a natural human ability or a mere personal preference, but a supernatural endowment, a gift from God, enabling one to live a life devoted to the kingdom without the responsibilities of marriage.
Verse Breakdown
"But he said unto them,"
This phrase marks Jesus' direct and authoritative response to His disciples, indicating a clarification or counterpoint to their previous statement. It sets the stage for a crucial teaching that refines their understanding.
"All [men] cannot receive this saying,"
Jesus asserts a limitation on human capacity. The "saying" refers to the disciples' own conclusion in Matthew 19:10, that it is "not good to marry" given the strictness of Jesus' teaching on divorce. Jesus states that not everyone possesses the spiritual or practical ability to embrace such a life of celibacy. This implies that celibacy is not a universally viable option for all believers.
"save [they] to whom it is given."
This clause introduces the exception and the divine provision. The capacity to live a celibate life is not a result of human will or effort alone, but is a specific endowment from God. The passive construction "it is given" (Greek: dedotai) emphasizes that this ability is a divine bestowal, a gift of grace, rather than an inherent trait or a self-achieved state. It points to God's sovereign hand in equipping individuals for distinct callings.
Literary Devices
The verse employs Contrast to highlight the difference between general human capacity and divinely bestowed ability. Jesus contrasts "All men cannot receive" with "save they to whom it is given," drawing a clear distinction between what is naturally possible and what is supernaturally enabled. There is also an implicit Divine Passive in "it is given," where the agent (God) is unstated but understood, emphasizing that the capacity for celibacy is a gift from a divine source. This rhetorical choice underscores God's sovereignty in distributing spiritual gifts and callings.
Theological and Thematic Connections
Matthew 19:11 profoundly shapes our understanding of divine calling and spiritual gifts within the Christian life. It teaches that while marriage is the normative and blessed path for most, God sovereignly bestows a unique gift of celibacy upon some individuals, enabling them to live a life of singular devotion to His kingdom without the responsibilities of marriage. This gift is not a sign of spiritual superiority, but a specific grace for a particular purpose, demonstrating the diverse ways God equips His people. It underscores that all vocations, whether married or single, are honorable when lived in accordance with God's will and empowered by His grace.
Reflection and Application
This verse offers profound insights for personal discernment and communal understanding within the body of Christ. For individuals, it encourages honest self-assessment regarding one's calling: Am I genuinely gifted for celibacy, or is marriage my intended path? It frees believers from societal or religious pressures to conform to one state over another, emphasizing that both marriage and celibacy are valid and honorable in God's eyes when lived out in faith and obedience. For the church, it fosters a deeper appreciation for the diverse gifts and callings within its membership, promoting respect and support for both married couples and single individuals. Recognizing celibacy as a divine gift helps the community value and empower those who serve the kingdom with an undivided devotion, acknowledging the unique grace required for such a life. Ultimately, it calls us to seek God's will for our lives, trusting that He equips us for whatever path He calls us to.
Questions for Reflection
FAQ
What "saying" is Jesus referring to when He says "All men cannot receive this saying"?
Jesus is referring to the disciples' own conclusion in Matthew 19:10, where they responded to His strict teaching on marriage and divorce by saying, "If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry." The "saying" is the idea that, given the indissoluble nature of marriage as taught by Jesus, it might be better to remain unmarried. Jesus' statement in Matthew 19:11 clarifies that this radical option of celibacy is not for everyone, but only for those divinely enabled.
Does this verse imply that marriage is not for everyone, or that celibacy is a universal expectation for Christians?
No, quite the opposite. By stating that "All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given," Jesus implicitly affirms that marriage is the normative state for the majority. He is not suggesting that celibacy is a universal expectation or a superior state for all believers. Instead, He is highlighting that the capacity for celibacy is a special, divinely bestowed gift for a select few, enabling them to serve the kingdom in a unique way, as further elaborated in Matthew 19:12.
Is celibacy considered a more spiritual or holy state than marriage according to this verse?
This verse does not suggest that celibacy is inherently more spiritual or holy than marriage. Both states are presented as legitimate and honorable callings from God. While celibacy, when divinely gifted, allows for an "undivided devotion" to the Lord (1 Corinthians 7:35), marriage is also a sacred institution ordained by God, reflecting the union of Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:31-32). The emphasis is on God's sovereign gifting and the faithful stewardship of whichever calling one receives.
Christ-Centered Fulfillment
Matthew 19:11, while directly addressing the gift of celibacy, finds its ultimate fulfillment and deepest meaning in the person and work of Jesus Christ. Jesus Himself lived a life of celibacy, not out of inability or lack, but out of a singular, unwavering devotion to His Father's will and the establishment of the kingdom of heaven. His life perfectly exemplifies the "undivided devotion" that the gift of celibacy enables, as He was fully consumed with His mission to seek and save the lost (Luke 19:10). The "giving" mentioned in the verse points to God's sovereign grace, a grace supremely manifest in the giving of His Son, Jesus Christ, for the redemption of humanity (John 3:16). Furthermore, just as the capacity for celibacy is a divine gift, so too is faith itself and the very gift of salvation, which are not earned by human effort but are freely "given" through Christ's atoning sacrifice on the cross (Ephesians 2:8-9). Thus, the verse subtly foreshadows the ultimate divine bestowal: the gift of new life in Christ, enabling believers to live for Him, whether in marriage or in singleness, reflecting His own perfect obedience and dedication to the Father's glory.