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“Christ and the Church: The Marriage Standard”· Ephesians 5:22–33
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Public-domain commentary
Matthew Henry
From his Commentary on the Whole Bible. Henry comments on passages, not single verses — this entry covers Ephesians 5:21–33.
Passage under commentEphesians 5:21–33
21¶ Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.
22Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
25Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
27That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
28So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
29For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
30For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
31For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
32This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
33Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
Here the apostle begins his exhortation to the discharge of relative duties. As a general foundation for these duties, he lays down that rule Eph 5:21. There is a mutual submission that Christians owe one to another, condescending to bear one another's burdens: not advancing themselves above others, nor domineering over one another and giving laws to one another. Paul was an example of this truly Christian temper, for he became all things to all men. We must be of a yielding and of a submissive spirit, and ready to all the duties of the respective places and stations that God has allotted to us in the world. In the fear of God, that is, so far as is consistent with the fear of God, for his sake, and out of conscience towards him, and that hereby we may give proof that we truly fear him. Where there is this mutual condescension and submission, the duties of all relations will be the better performed. From Eph 5:22 to the end he speaks of the duties of husbands and wives; and he speaks of these in a Christian manner, setting the church as an example of the wife's subjection, and Christ as an example of love in husbands.
I.The duty prescribed to wives is submission to their husbands in the Lord (Eph 5:22), which submission includes the honouring and obeying of them, and that from a principle of love to them. They must do this in compliance with God's authority, who has commanded it, which is doing it as unto the Lord; or it may be understood by way of similitude and likeness, so that the sense may be, "as, being devoted to God, you submit yourselves unto him." From the former sense we may learn that by a conscientious discharge of the duties we owe to our fellow-creatures we obey and please God himself; and, from the latter, that God not only requires and insists on those duties which immediately respect himself, but such as respect our neighbours too. The apostle assigns the reason of this submission from wives: For the husband is the head of the wife, Eph 5:23. The metaphor is taken from the head in the natural body, which, being the seat of reason, of wisdom, and of knowledge, and the fountain of sense and motion, is more excellent than the rest of the body. God has given the man the pre-eminence and a right to direct and govern by creation, and in that original law of the relation, Thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. Whatever there is of uneasiness in this, it is an effect of sin coming into the world. Generally, too, the man has (what he ought to have) a superiority in wisdom and knowledge. He is therefore the head, even as Christ is the head of the church. There is a resemblance of Christ's authority over the church in that superiority and headship which God has appointed to the husband. The apostle adds, and he is the Saviour of the body. Christ's authority is exercised over the church for the saving of her from evil, and the supplying of her with every thing good for her. In like manner should the husband be employed for the protection and comfort of his spouse; and therefore she should the more cheerfully submit herself unto him. So it follows, Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ (Eph 5:24), with cheerfulness, with fidelity, with humility, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing - in every thing to which their authority justly extends itself, in every thing lawful and consistent with duty to God.
II.The duty of husbands (on the other hand), is to love their wives (Eph 5:25); for without this they would abuse their superiority and headship, and, wherever this prevails as it ought to do, it will infer the other duties of the relation, it being a special and peculiar affection that is required in her behalf. The love of Christ to the church is proposed as an example of this, which love of his is a sincere, a pure, an ardent, and constant affection, and that notwithstanding the imperfections and failures that she is guilty of. The greatness of his love to the church appeared in his giving himself unto the death for it. Observe, As the church's subjection to Christ is proposed as an exemplar to wives, so the love of Christ to his church is proposed as a pattern to husbands; and while such exemplars are offered to both, and so much is required of each, neither has reason to complain of the divine injunctions. The love which God requires from the husband in behalf of his wife will make amends for the subjection which he demands from her to her husband; and the prescribed subjection of the wife will be an abundant return for that love of the husband which God has made her due. The apostle, having mentioned Christ's love to the church, enlarges upon it, assigning the reason why he gave himself for it, namely, that he might sanctify it in this world, and glorify it in the next: That he might sanctify and cleanse it, with the washing of water by the word (Eph 5:26) - that he might endue all his members with a principle of holiness, and deliver them from the guilt, the pollution, and the dominion of sin. The instrumental means whereby this is affected are the instituted sacraments, particularly the washing of baptism and the preaching and reception of the gospel. And that he might present it to himself, etc., Eph 5:27. Dr. Lightfoot thinks the apostle alludes here to the Jews' extraordinary carefulness in their washings for purification. They were careful that there should be no wrinkle to keep the flesh from the water, and no spot nor dirt which was not thoroughly washed. Others understand him as alluding to a garment come newly out of the fuller's hand, purged from spots, stretched from wrinkles, the former newly contracted, the latter by long time and custom. That he might present it to himself - that he might perfectly unite it to himself in the great day, a glorious church, perfect in knowledge and in holiness, not having spot, nor wrinkle, nor any such thing, nothing of deformity or defilement remaining, but being entirely amiable and pleasing in his eye, holy and without blemish, free from the least remains of sin. The church in general, and particular believers, will not be without spot or wrinkle till they come to glory. From this and the former verse together we may take notice that the glorifying of the church is intended in the sanctifying of it: and that those, and those only, who are sanctified now, will be glorified hereafter. - So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies, etc., Eph 5:28. The wife being made one with her husband (not in a natural, but in a civil and in a relative sense), this is an argument why he should love her with as cordial and as ardent an affection as that which he loves himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh, Eph 5:29 - (no man in his right senses ever hated himself, however deformed, or whatever his imperfections might be); so far from it that he nourishes and cherishes it; he uses himself with a great deal of care and tenderness, and is industrious to supply himself with every thing convenient or good for him, with food and clothing, etc. Even as the Lord the church: that is, as the Lord nourishes and cherishes the church, which he furnishes with all things that he sees needful or good for her, with whatever conduces to her everlasting happiness and welfare. The apostle adds, For we are members of his body, of his flesh and of his bones, Eph 5:30. He assigns this as a reason why Christ nourishes and cherishes his church - because all who belong to it are members of his body, that is, of his mystical body. Or, we are members out of his body: all the grace and glory which the church has are from Christ, as Eve was taken out of the man. But, as one observes, it being the manner of the sacred writings to express a complex body by the enumeration of its several parts, as the heaven and earth for the world, evening and morning for the natural day, so here, by body, flesh, and bones, we are to understand himself, the meaning of the verse being that we are members of Christ. - For this cause (because they are one, as Christ and his church are one) shall a man leave his father and mother; the apostle refers to the words of Adam, when Eve was given to him for a meet help, Gen 2:24. We are not to understand by this that a man's obligation to other relations is cancelled upon his marriage, but only that this relation is to be preferred to all others, there being a nearer union between these two than between any others, that the man must rather leave any of those than his wife. - And they two shall be one flesh, that is, by virtue of the matrimonial bond. This is a great mystery, Eph 5:32. Those words of Adam, just mentioned by the apostle, are spoken literally of marriage; but they have also a hidden mystical sense in them, relating to the union between Christ and his church, of which the conjugal union between Adam and the mother of us all was a type: though not instituted or appointed by God to signify this, yet it was a kind of natural type, as having a resemblance to it: I speak concerning Christ and the church.
After this, the apostle concludes this part of his discourse with a brief summary of the duty of husbands and wives, Eph 5:33. "Nevertheless (though there be such a secret mystical sense, yet the plain literal sense concerns you) let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself, with such a sincere, peculiar, singular, and prevailing affection as that is which he bears to himself. And the wife see that she reverence her husband." Reverence consists of love and esteem, which produce a care to please, and of fear, which awakens a caution lest just offence be given. That the wife thus reverence her husband is the will of God and the law of the relation.
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Historical interpretation
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3 surviving comments on this verse. Each one is dated, so this reads as a timeline rather than a list.
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When, therefore, the mingled cup and the manufactured bread receives the Word of God, and the Eucharist of the blood and the body of Christ is made, from which things the substance of our flesh is increased and supported, how can they affirm that the flesh is incapable of receiving the gift of God, which is life eternal, which flesh is nourished from the body and blood of the Lord, and is a member of Him?-even as the blessed Paul declares in his Epistle to the Ephesians, that "we are members of His body, of His flesh, and of His bones."
"Because we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones."
Tell me not that such and such things are so. Seest thou not that we have in our own flesh itself many defects? For one man, for instance, is lame, another has his feet distorted, another his hands withered, another some other member weak; and yet nevertheless he does not grieve at it, nor cut it off, but oftentimes prefers it even to the other. Naturally enough; for it is part of himself. As great love as each entertains towards himself, so great he would have us entertain towards a wife. Not because we partake of the same nature; no, this ground of duty towards a wife is far greater than that; it is that there are not two bodies but one; he the head, she the body. And how saith he elsewhere "and the Head of Christ is God"? This I too say, that as we are one body, so also are Christ and the Father One. And thus then is the Father also found to be our Head. He sets down two examples, that of the natural body and that of Christ's body.
Just as Eve was fashioned from Adam, so were we from Christ the Lord. We are buried with him in baptism. We rise with him. We eat his body and drink his blood [in the Eucharist].
Source: Quotations drawn from early Church Fathers and historical Christian theologians (AD 100–1500). Some quotes address the surrounding passage context rather than this verse alone.
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Summary
Ephesians 5:30 profoundly articulates the intimate, organic union between Christ and His Church, serving as the theological foundation for Paul's instructions on marriage. This verse reveals that believers are not merely followers but are intrinsically connected to Christ, forming a singular spiritual body, sharing in His very essence and life, much like Adam's declaration concerning Eve. This deep spiritual reality underscores the Church's identity and the basis for mutual love and care within the Christian community, mirroring Christ's sacrificial love for His people.
Context
Literary Context
Ephesians 5:30 is situated within Paul's extensive discourse on Christian living, specifically focusing on the sacred institution of marriage. Beginning in Ephesians 5:22 and extending through Ephesians 5:33, Paul uses the husband-wife relationship as a profound earthly analogy for the divine union between Christ and the Church. He exhorts husbands to love their wives with the same self-sacrificial love that Christ demonstrated for the Church. Verse 29 explains that "no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church." Ephesians 5:30 then provides the foundational reason for this parallel: the Church is literally "members of his body," making Christ's care for the Church an act of self-nourishment. The subsequent verse, Ephesians 5:31, directly quotes Genesis 2:24, reinforcing the "one flesh" concept that undergirds both marriage and the Christ-Church union.
Historical & Cultural Context
Paul's letter to the Ephesians was written to a diverse church in a significant Roman provincial capital, a melting pot of various cultures, philosophies, and religions. The concept of a "body" was familiar in ancient thought, often used to describe political or social entities, but Paul redefines it with a unique spiritual significance. The specific reference to "flesh and bones" in Ephesians 5:30 directly echoes the ancient Near Eastern covenantal language found in Genesis 2:23, where Adam recognizes Eve as "bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh." This phrase signified the closest possible kinship and an inseparable union. By invoking this language, Paul taps into a deeply ingrained cultural understanding of intimate, familial, and covenantal bonds, elevating the spiritual union between Christ and His Church to this primordial, foundational level. This would have resonated powerfully with both Jewish and Gentile believers, emphasizing the profound unity forged in Christ, transcending previous societal and religious divisions.
Key Themes
This verse contributes significantly to several major theological themes within Ephesians and the broader Pauline corpus. The primary theme is The Church as the Body of Christ, a recurring metaphor that emphasizes the organic unity, interdependence, and vital connection between Christ as the Head and believers as His members. This concept is foundational to understanding Christian unity and purpose, as seen in Ephesians 1:22-23 and Colossians 1:18. Another crucial theme is Intimate, Organic Union with Christ. The specific phrase "of his flesh, and of his bones" elevates this union beyond mere association to a shared essence, implying that believers partake in Christ's very life and nature, much like branches abiding in the vine in John 15:5. This union is the basis for the Church's identity and its ability to function as Christ's presence in the world. Finally, the verse undergirds the theme of Mutual Love and Care within the Community. Because believers are so intimately joined to Christ and, by extension, to one another, the imperative for husbands to love their wives as their own bodies (and for believers to love one another) gains immense power. To harm or neglect another believer is akin to harming Christ Himself, as they are part of His very being, as illustrated in 1 Corinthians 12:26.
Exposition and Analysis
Key Word Analysis
This conjunction introduces the reason or basis for the preceding statement. In Ephesians 5:29, Paul states that "no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church." Verse 30, beginning with "For," explains why Christ nourishes and cherishes the Church: because the Church is literally part of His own spiritual body. This word highlights the logical connection and foundational truth being presented.
This term refers to a limb or a part of the body. In the context of the physical body, each mélos is distinct yet indispensable, contributing to the overall function and well-being of the whole. Applied to the Church, it emphasizes that individual believers are not isolated units but integral, functional components of Christ's spiritual body. This choice of word underscores the organic, interdependent nature of the Church, where every believer has a vital role and connection to the Head, Christ.
A primary preposition denoting origin, "from" or "out of." This preposition is crucial here as it signifies that believers derive their existence and identity from Christ's body. It implies a source and an organic connection, not merely an association. We are not just "members in his body," but "members of his body," indicating that our very being as members originates from Him, emphasizing a deep, shared essence.
While "flesh" can sometimes denote human weakness or sinfulness in Pauline theology, here, especially in conjunction with "bones," it refers to the physical substance of a body, emphasizing its tangible and real nature. In the context of Genesis 2:23, "flesh of my flesh" signifies the closest possible consanguinity and intimate union. When applied to Christ and the Church, it powerfully conveys a profound, shared essence and reality, moving beyond a mere metaphor to a spiritual reality of profound intimacy and shared life.
Referring to the skeletal structure, "bones" signify the foundational, enduring, and essential components of a physical body. Paired with "flesh," as in the Genesis account, it reinforces the concept of an inseparable, organic, and deeply rooted union. For believers to be "of his bones" means they share in the very structural integrity and core identity of Christ's spiritual body, highlighting the depth and permanence of their union with Him.
Verse Breakdown
"For we are members of his body"
This clause establishes the fundamental truth that believers constitute an integral part of Christ's spiritual body. The "for" connects this statement to the preceding truth that Christ nourishes and cherishes the Church because it is His own. "Members" (Greek melē) signifies individual, functional parts, emphasizing that each believer is essential and contributes to the whole. This is not merely a symbolic connection but a profound spiritual reality where Christ is the Head and the Church is His living extension on earth.
"of his flesh"
This phrase, along with "of his bones," draws a direct parallel to Adam's declaration about Eve in Genesis 2:23. "Flesh" here refers to the shared substance and intimate connection, signifying that believers partake in Christ's very essence and life. It implies a deep, organic unity, where the Church shares in Christ's humanity, His nature, and His life, making the union incredibly personal and real.
"and of his bones"
Completing the parallel from Genesis, "bones" signifies the foundational, structural, and enduring aspect of this union. Just as Eve was taken from Adam's rib, symbolizing an inseparable bond, so too are believers fundamentally connected to Christ's very being. This emphasizes the strength, permanence, and depth of the spiritual union, highlighting that the Church is not merely associated with Christ but is built upon and shares in His essential identity and strength.
Literary Devices
Ephesians 5:30 employs several powerful literary devices to convey its profound theological truth. The most prominent is Metaphor, specifically the Body Metaphor, where the Church is depicted as the "body" of which Christ is the "Head." This metaphor, pervasive in Paul's epistles, emphasizes organic unity, interdependence, and the vital, life-giving connection between Christ and believers. Every member is essential, and all function together under Christ's direction. Closely related is Allusion, as the phrase "of his flesh, and of his bones" is a direct and intentional echo of Adam's declaration in Genesis 2:23 upon seeing Eve. This Allusion to the primordial union of husband and wife elevates the Christ-Church relationship to the level of ultimate intimacy, shared essence, and covenantal bond. Furthermore, the entire passage from Ephesians 5:22 to Ephesians 5:33 functions as an Analogy or Typology, where the earthly marriage serves as a type or shadow of the heavenly reality of Christ and the Church. This verse, in particular, provides the theological rationale for the analogy, explaining why marriage can illustrate this divine mystery.
Theological and Thematic Connections
Ephesians 5:30 is a cornerstone for understanding the Church's identity and its intimate relationship with Christ. It underscores the profound truth that believers are not just a collection of individuals, but an organic, living entity vitally connected to their Head, Jesus Christ. This union is so deep that it is likened to the "one flesh" bond of marriage, implying shared life, shared destiny, and shared essence. This theological reality forms the basis for Christian unity, mutual care, and the Church's mission as Christ's continuing presence in the world. It means that what affects one member of the body affects Christ Himself, demanding a high standard of love, nourishment, and cherishing within the community of faith.
Reflection and Application
Understanding that "we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones" transforms our perception of our identity, our community, and our purpose. This truth calls us to live in a way that honors this profound union. Individually, it means recognizing our inherent value and connection to Christ, drawing life and strength directly from Him. Communally, it compels us to live in deep unity, mutual love, and sacrificial service, recognizing that every believer is an indispensable part of Christ's ongoing work in the world. Just as Christ nourishes and cherishes His body, the Church, we are called to nourish and cherish one another, reflecting His love and care. This truth should inspire us to prioritize the health and well-being of the Church, to resolve conflicts with grace, and to serve each other with humility, knowing that in doing so, we are serving Christ Himself.
Questions for Reflection
FAQ
What does "of his flesh, and of his bones" specifically mean in this verse?
This phrase is a direct allusion to Genesis 2:23, where Adam declares Eve to be "bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh." In that context, it signifies the closest possible kinship, an inseparable, organic, and covenantal union, indicating that Eve was taken from Adam's very being. When Paul applies this language to Christ and the Church in Ephesians 5:30, he is emphasizing that believers are not merely associated with Christ, but share in His very essence, life, and nature. It conveys a profound, intimate, and vital spiritual union, making the Church truly an extension of Christ's own being.
How does this verse relate to the concept of the Church as the "Body of Christ"?
Ephesians 5:30 is a foundational statement for the "Body of Christ" metaphor, which is central to Paul's ecclesiology. While other passages like 1 Corinthians 12:12-27 and Romans 12:4-5 elaborate on the functional diversity and unity within the body, Ephesians 5:30 emphasizes the organic and ontological connection. It explains why the Church is His body: because believers are "of his flesh, and of his bones," signifying a shared life and essence derived directly from Him. This deep connection is the basis for Christ's nourishing and cherishing of the Church, as one would care for one's own body (Ephesians 5:29).
Christ-Centered Fulfillment
Ephesians 5:30 finds its ultimate fulfillment in the person and work of Jesus Christ, who, through His incarnation, death, and resurrection, made this profound union possible. Christ, the eternal Son of God, took on human "flesh and bones" (John 1:14), identifying fully with humanity, yet without sin. His sacrificial death on the cross purchased the Church, cleansing and sanctifying her (Ephesians 5:25-27). Through His resurrection and ascension, Christ became the Head of the Church, His body (Ephesians 1:22-23), pouring out His Spirit to unite believers to Himself and to one another (1 Corinthians 12:13). This verse, echoing the primordial union in Genesis, points to Christ as the New Adam, from whom His Bride, the Church, is formed, sharing in His very life and nature. The "one flesh" mystery of marriage (Ephesians 5:31) is revealed as a profound picture of the "great mystery" of Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:32), a union secured by Christ's redemptive work and sustained by His ongoing headship and nourishing care.