1 Timothy 1:13

For, when affirming that Christ came for this end, that He might save sinners, of whom himself had been the "first," what does he add? "And I obtained mercy, because I did (so) ignorantly in unbelief." Thus that clemency of God, preferring the repentance of a sinner to his death, looks at such as are ignorant still, and still unbelieving, for the sake of whose liberation Christ came; not (at such) as already know God, and have learnt the sacrament of the faith.

For one who errs by simplicity may be pardoned, as the blessed Apostle Paul says of himself, "I who at first was a blasphemer, and a persecutor, and injurious; yet obtained mercy, because I did it ignorantly."

At this point in my discourse I confess my amazement at the wise dispensation of the Holy Spirit, in limiting the epistles of the others to a small number but granting grace to Paul, the former persecutor, to write fourteen. For it was not as though Peter and John were less than Paul that he withheld the gift in their case—God forbid!—but that his doctrine might be beyond question, he gave the grace to the former enemy and persecutor to write more, that thus we might all be confirmed in our faith. Indeed, all were astonished at Paul and said, “Is not this he who used to make havoc” previously “and who has come here for the purpose of taking us in bonds to Jerusalem?” Do not be astonished, Paul says, “I know that ‘it is hard for me to kick against the goad.’21 I know that ‘I am not worthy to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God,’ but ‘I acted ignorantly.’ For I considered the preaching of Christ to be the destruction of the law, for I did not know that he came ‘to fulfill the law, not to destroy it.’23 But ‘the grace of our Lord has abounded beyond measure in me.’ ”

Then observe how he magnifies the mercy and loving-kindness of God, in describing his former life, "who was formerly," he says, "a blasphemer, and a persecutor, and injurious." And when he speaks of the still unbelieving Jews, he rather extenuates their guilt. "For I bear them record that they have a zeal for God, but not according to knowledge." (Rom. x. 2.) But of himself he says, "Who was a blasphemer and a persecutor." Observe his lowering of himself! So free was he from self-love, so full of humility, that he is not satisfied to call himself a persecutor and a blasphemer, but he aggravates his guilt, showing that it did not stop with himself, that it was not enough that he was a blasphemer, but in the madness of his blasphemy he persecuted those who were willing to be godly.

"But I obtained mercy because I did it ignorantly in unbelief."

Why then did other Jews not obtain mercy? Because what they did, they did not ignorantly, but willfully, well knowing what they did. For this we have the testimony of the Evangelist. "Many of the Jews believed on Him, but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him. For they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God." (John xii. 42, 43.) And Christ again said to them, "How can ye believe, who receive honor one of another" (John v. 44)? and the parents of the blind man "said these things for fear of the Jews, lest they should be put out of the synagogue." (John ix. 22) Nay the Jews themselves said, "Perceive ye how we avail nothing? behold, the world is gone after Him." (John xii. 19) Thus their love of power was everywhere in their way. When they admitted that no one can forgive sins but God only, and Christ immediately did that very thing, which they had confessed to be a sign of divinity, this could not be a case of ignorance.

But it is worthy of enquiry, how one so skillful in the law as Paul could be ignorant? For it is he who says, "which He had promised before by His holy prophets." (Rom. iv. 2.) How is it then that thou knowest not, thou who art zealous of the law of their fathers, who wert brought up at the feet of Gamaliel? Yet they who spent their days on lakes and rivers, and the very publicans, have embraced the Gospel, whilst thou that studiest the law art persecuting it! It is for this he condemns himself, saying, "I am not meet to be called an Apostle." (1 Cor. ix. 9.) It is for this he confesses his ignorance, which was produced by unbelief. For this cause, he says, that he obtained "mercy." What then does he mean when he says, "He counted me faithful"? He would give up no right of his Master's: even his own part he ascribed to Him, and assumed nothing to himself, nor claimed for his own the glory which was due to God. Hence in another place we find him exclaiming, "Sirs, why do ye these things to us? we also are men of like passions with you." (Acts xiv. 15.) So again, "He counted me faithful." And again, "I labored more abundantly than they all, yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me." (1 Cor. xv. 10.) And again, "It is He that worketh in us both to will and to do." (Phil. ii. 13.) Thus in acknowledging that he "obtained mercy," he owns that he deserved punishment, since mercy is for such. And again in another place he says of the Jews, "Blindness in part is happened to Israel." (Rom. xi. 25)

But where was Paul then? Perhaps one should say he was sitting at the feet of Gamaliel, and took no part with the multitude who conspired against Jesus: for Gamaliel does not appear to have been an ambitious man. Then how is it that afterwards Paul was found joining with the multitude? He saw the doctrine growing, and on the point of prevailing, and being generally embraced. For in the lifetime of Christ, the disciples consorted with Him, and afterwards with their teachers, but when they were completely separated, Paul did not act as the other Jews did, from the love of power, but from zeal. For what was the motive of his journey to Damascus? He thought the doctrine pernicious, and was afraid that the preaching of it would spread everywhere. But with the Jews it was no concern for the multitude, but the love of power, that influenced their actions. Hence they say, "The Romans will come and take away both our place and nation." (John xi. 48.) What fear was this that agitated them, but that of man?

We heard the reading from the apostle, and perhaps some of you may be worried by what is written there, “According to the justice which is from the law, I was without reproach. Whatever was a gain for me, that I have regarded as a dead loss on account of Christ.” Then he went on to say, “I have reckoned it to be not only a dead loss, but even muck, that I may gain Christ and may be found in him, not having my own justice which is from the law, but the justice which is from the faith of Jesus Christ.” The question is, how could he consider conducting himself without reproach according to the justice which is from the law, to be so much muck and loss? After all, who gave the law?… But let us listen to what he says in another place, “It was not as a result of works,” he says, “which we have done ourselves, but according to his own mercy that he saved us, by means of the bath of rebirth.” And again, “I, who was previously a blasphemer and persecutor, and an overbearing man; but I obtained mercy,” and so on. On the one hand he affirmed that he conducted himself without reproach; on the other he confessed he had been a sinner of such proportions that no sinners need despair of themselves, precisely because even Paul had found remission.

From being a persecutor he was changed into “a preacher and the teacher of the nations.” “Previously,” he says, “I was a blasphemer and persecutor and an insolent man. But the reason I obtained mercy was this, that Christ Jesus might demonstrate his forbearance first of all in me, and for the instruction of those who were going to trust him for eternal life.” It is by the grace of God, you see, that we are saved from our sins, in which we are languishing. God alone is the medicine that cures the soul. The soul was well able to injure itself but quite unable to cure itself. In the body, too, after all, people have it in their power to get sick, but not equally in their power to get better. I mean, if they exceed the proper limits, and live self-indulgent lives and do all the things that undermine the constitution and are injurious to health, the day comes, if that’s what they want, when they fall sick. When they’ve so fallen, though, they don’t get better. In order to fall sick, you see, they apply themselves to self-indulgence. But in order to get better, they must apply the doctor’s services to their health.… And so it goes with the soul.

What then is this “grace for grace”? By faith we first win God’s favor; and for us who were not worthy to have our sins forgiven, from the very fact that, though unworthy, we received so great a gift, it is called grace. What is grace? That which is given gratuitously. That which is bestowed, not paid back. If it was owed, recompense was paid, not grace bestowed.… Having acquired this grace of faith, you will be just by faith. “For the just man lives by faith.” And you will first win God’s favor from living by faith. When you have won God’s favor from living by faith, you will receive as a reward immortality and everlasting life. And that is grace.… Paul acknowledges this grace when he says that he had before been a blasphemer and a persecutor, and insulting, “but I obtained mercy.”

Paul introduces a new kind of admonition by exhorting others “by the mercy of God.” Why does he not exhort through God’s might, or majesty, or glory? Why by his mercy? Because it was through that mercy alone that Paul escaped from the criminal state of a persecutor and obtained the dignity of his great apostolate. He himself tells us this, “For I formerly was a blasphemer, a persecutor and a bitter adversary; but I obtained the mercy of God.” … “I exhort you by the mercy of God.” Paul asks—rather, God himself is asking through Paul—for God has greater desire to be loved than feared. God is asking because he wants to be not so much a Lord as a Father.

though I was formerly a blasphemer and a persecutor and a violent man; but I was shown mercy because I acted ignorantly in unbelief.

though I was formerly a blasphemer. See how Paul increases the mercy of God, remembering his former life, and showing whom he chose to have mercy on.

And a persecutor. For Paul would say: Not only was I uttering blasphemies, but also by persecuting others, I compelled them to speak blasphemies.

but I was shown mercy. Paul shows himself worthy of punishment, for mercy is shown in these cases.

because I acted ignorantly. If Paul did it ignorantly, he was shown mercy; why then were not the Jews also shown mercy? And we say, first of all, that they do not want it. For those who approached Christ were shown mercy. But why did not all see the vision as Paul did? For if so, all would have approached. Because Paul persecuted out of ignorance, but those others did so knowingly. Heard the evangelist saying that many of the Pharisees and Jews believed, but they did not confess it; "For they loved the glory of men more than the glory of God." (Jn. 12:43) And again Jesus said to them; "How can you believe, who receive glory from one another?" (Jn. 5:44) And again: "This they said, his parents said, because of the Jews, so that they themselves would not be put out of the synagogue." (Jn. 9:22) And the Jews themselves were saying, "Do you see that we are not benefiting at all? Behold, the whole world is going after him." (Jn. 12:19) Did you see them sinning in knowledge, for the sake of ambition? At that time Paul was perhaps at the feet of Gamaliel, not associating with the crowd, and after that, seeing the faith of Christ increasing, he was zealous with the zeal of God, though not in full knowledge.

in unbelief. From the law, Paul read about Christ. Therefore, since he did not immediately believe in Christ, he calls the matter concern, born from unbelief.