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Commentary on 1 Corinthians 7 verses 36–38
In this passage the apostle is commonly supposed to give advice about the disposal of children in marriage, upon the principle of his former determination. In this view the general meaning is plain. It was in that age, and those parts of the world, and especially among the Jews, reckoned a disgrace for a woman to remain unmarried past a certain number of years: it gave a suspicion of somewhat that was not for her reputation. "Now," says the apostle, "if any man thinks he behaves unhandsomely towards his daughter, and that it is not for her credit to remain unmarried, when she is of full age, and that upon this principle it is needful to dispose of her in marriage, he may use his pleasure. It is no sin in him to dispose of her to a suitable mate. But if a man has determined in himself to keep her a virgin, and stands to this determination, and is under no necessity to dispose of her in marriage, but is at liberty, with her consent, to pursue his purpose, he does well in keeping her a virgin. In short, he that gives her in marriage does well; but he that keeps her single, if she can be easy and innocent in such a state, does what is better; that is, more convenient for her in the present state of things, if not at all times and seasons." Note, 1. Children should be at the disposal of their parents, and not dispose of themselves in marriage. Yet, 2. Parents should consult their children's inclinations, both to marriage in general and to the person in particular, and not reckon they have uncontrollable power to do with them, and dictate to them, as they please. 3. It is our duty not only to consider what is lawful, but in many cases, at least, what is fit to be done, before we do it.
But I think the apostle is here continuing his former discourse, and advising unmarried persons, who are at their own disposal, what to do, the man's virgin being meant of his virginity. Tērein tēn heautou parthenon seems to be rather meant of preserving his own virginity than keeping his daughter a virgin, though it be altogether uncommon to use the word in this sense. Several other reasons may be seen in Locke and Whitby, by those who will consult them. And it was a common matter of reproach among Jews and civilized heathens, for a man to continue single beyond such a term of years, though all did not agree in limiting the single life to the same term. The general meaning of the apostle is the same, that it was no sin to marry, if a man thought there was a necessity upon, to avoid popular reproach, much less to avoid the hurrying fervours of lust. But he that was in his own power, stood firm in his purpose, and found himself under no necessity to marry, would, at that season, and in the circumstances of Christians at that time, at least, make a choice every way most for his own conveniency, ease, and advantage, as to his spiritual concerns. And it is highly expedient, if not a duty, for Christians to be guided by such a consideration.
Wherefore he rejects those of the more incontinent, who, under the influence of vain-glory, would advance to this state, advising them to marry, lest in their time of manly strength, the flesh stirring up the desires and passions, they should be goaded on to defile the soul. For let us consider what he lays down:
Paul always wants the best out of Christians. If someone really wants to get married, then it is better to marry publicly according to the permission given than to behave badly and be ashamed in private.
"But if any man think that he behaveth himself unseemly toward his virgin."
Here he seems to be talking about marriage; but all that he says relates to virginity; for he allows even a second marriage, saying, "only in the Lord." Now what means, "in the Lord?" With chastity, with honor: for this is needed everywhere, and must be pursued for else we cannot see God.
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SUMMARY
1 Corinthians 7:36 provides specific, pastoral counsel regarding a father's decision concerning his virgin daughter's marriage. It addresses the concern that a father might act improperly by keeping his daughter unmarried past her prime age for marriage, especially if she has a strong desire or need to marry. Paul reassures such a father that if these conditions are met, allowing her to marry is not a sin, but rather a permissible and appropriate course of action, balancing the ideals of singleness with the realities of human nature and societal expectations.
CONTEXT
EXPOSITION AND ANALYSIS
Key Word Analysis
Verse Breakdown
Literary Devices
Paul employs several literary devices in this verse to convey his nuanced counsel. The primary structure is a Conditional Clause ("But if... if... then..."), which clearly sets out the circumstances under which his advice applies, demonstrating a logical and pragmatic approach to a complex issue. The phrase "pass the flower of her age" is a clear Euphemism or Figurative Language, delicately referring to a woman being past her youthful prime for marriage without being blunt or offensive. This reflects sensitivity to the cultural context. Furthermore, Paul uses Direct Instruction and Imperative Mood ("let him do what he will," "let them marry") to provide clear, authoritative guidance, reassuring the father and explicitly granting permission. This directness serves to alleviate anxiety and remove any sense of guilt associated with choosing marriage over singleness in these specific circumstances.
THEOLOGICAL AND THEMATIC CONNECTIONS
This verse beautifully illustrates the balance between spiritual ideals and practical realities within Christian living. While Paul often extols the virtues of singleness for undivided devotion to the Lord, he never elevates it to a command for all, nor does he disparage marriage. Instead, he demonstrates a profound pastoral sensitivity, acknowledging that human needs, cultural pressures, and individual inclinations must be considered within a framework of godly conduct. The core theological message is that marriage is a good and honorable institution, affirmed by God, and a legitimate path for believers who are called to it or for whom singleness proves difficult or leads to temptation. It underscores God's grace in providing avenues for human flourishing that are free from sin, even when they diverge from what might be considered the "more spiritual" path by some.
REFLECTION AND APPLICATION
1 Corinthians 7:36 offers timeless wisdom, even as cultural contexts shift. While fathers no longer typically "give away" their daughters in the same manner, the underlying principles of parental guidance, wisdom in life decisions, and the freedom to choose marriage without guilt remain profoundly relevant. For individuals, this verse reminds us that God's will is not a rigid, one-size-fits-all decree, but often encompasses the freedom to make choices that align with our genuine needs and desires, provided they are made in faith and without sin. It encourages us to consider our own capacity for singleness, our desires, and the practical implications of our choices, always seeking to honor God. For parents, it underscores the responsibility to guide their children wisely, discerning their needs and supporting their godly choices, whether toward marriage or singleness. Ultimately, it affirms that marriage is a blessed and legitimate path for those for whom it is appropriate, and that pursuing it under the right circumstances is not a compromise of faith but an expression of God's grace.
Questions for Reflection
FAQ
Does "pass the flower of her age" imply that there's a specific age limit for marriage, or that older women shouldn't marry?
Answer: No, "pass the flower of her age" (Greek: hypérakmos) is a cultural and figurative expression, not a strict biological or chronological age limit. It refers to a woman being past her youthful prime for marriage, which in ancient societies often meant late teens or early twenties, when women were typically married. The concern was that remaining unmarried beyond this point could lead to social difficulty, stigma, or increased temptation. The verse does not imply that older women should not marry, but rather addresses the specific concern of a father who might feel he is acting "uncomely" by keeping his daughter unmarried when she is past the customary age and has a strong "need" to marry. Paul's point is that if these conditions are met, allowing her to marry is perfectly acceptable and not sinful.
Is Paul contradicting his earlier preference for singleness in this chapter?
Answer: Paul is not contradicting himself but rather providing nuanced, pastoral counsel that accounts for individual circumstances and human realities. Throughout 1 Corinthians 7, Paul expresses a personal preference for singleness, especially "for the present distress" (1 Corinthians 7:26) and for "undistracted devotion to the Lord" (1 Corinthians 7:35). However, he consistently balances this with the understanding that not everyone has the gift of singleness and that marriage is a legitimate and God-ordained institution, particularly to avoid sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 7:2) or if one cannot "contain" (1 Corinthians 7:9). This verse (1 Corinthians 7:36) is an example of his practical wisdom, granting freedom and affirming that choosing marriage under certain conditions is not sinful but a wise and godly decision.
Does this verse apply to modern dating and marriage decisions, given the cultural shift from arranged marriages?
Answer: While the specific cultural context of a father's absolute authority over his daughter's marriage has changed in many societies, the underlying principles of 1 Corinthians 7:36 remain relevant. The verse speaks to the importance of wise decision-making regarding marriage, considering both spiritual devotion and practical human needs. It affirms that marriage is honorable and not sinful, especially when there is a genuine desire or "need" for it. For individuals today, it encourages self-awareness about one's capacity for singleness, the desire for companionship, and the avoidance of temptation. For parents, it highlights the ongoing responsibility to offer godly counsel and support to their adult children in their life choices, including marriage, respecting their autonomy while guiding them toward God-honoring paths. The core message is that God grants liberty within godly boundaries for such significant life decisions.
CHRIST-CENTERED FULFILLMENT
While 1 Corinthians 7:36 directly addresses a father's decision regarding his daughter's marriage, its Christ-centered fulfillment lies in the broader freedom and wisdom that Christ provides for all of life's decisions, including those pertaining to relationships and family. Jesus Himself affirmed the sanctity of marriage as a divine institution from creation (Matthew 19:4-6), even as He also spoke of those who choose singleness "for the sake of the kingdom of heaven" (Matthew 19:12). Paul's counsel in this verse, therefore, reflects the liberty found in Christ, where believers are not bound by legalistic constraints but are free to make choices that honor God and serve their well-being, without sin. Christ's work on the cross liberates us from the burden of unrighteousness, allowing us to pursue marriage or singleness with a clear conscience, knowing that both states can be lived out for God's glory. Ultimately, our decisions, whether to marry or remain single, are to be rooted in a desire to serve Christ and to live in a way that reflects His love and truth, understanding that He is the ultimate fulfillment of all human longing and need, whether met in singleness or within the covenant of marriage (Colossians 3:17).